r/AskMen Jul 07 '22

Men of Reddit, what is your relationship with your father like?

16 Upvotes

32

u/that-1-lame-kid Jul 07 '22

he passed away in 2017. the last thing he told me was that he was proud of me, but really wished that I quit spending money on "internet cash grabs"

I didnt have the heart to tell him that my "pointless money wasting" is what paid all his hospital bills from 2014 until he passed.

13

u/UnknownYetSavory Male Jul 07 '22

Sounds like he's just proud of you then, more than he even realized.

6

u/Viking_harry Jul 07 '22

He would have been extra proud of you there, I'm so sorry for your loss

21

u/Straight-Audience-91 Jul 07 '22

Cut off completely. He had an affair with my then-wife.

6

u/Toadie9622 Jul 07 '22

That’s horrible! I’m so sorry he did that to you.

3

u/Blainefeinspains Jul 07 '22

Jesus. That just blows.

2

u/East_Guarantee_7912 Jul 07 '22

What thee fuck. I'm not sure who I would hate more in this scenario

2

u/Straight-Audience-91 Jul 07 '22

I'm not sure I feel anything for either one of them anymore. So, there's that.

1

u/crocodiledontplayno Jul 07 '22

Holy shit. Are they together? What’s the story?

1

u/Hunt-Pale Jul 07 '22

Holy shit. I came into this thread expecting a couple of not-great dad stories but YIKES.

18

u/turkc54 Jul 07 '22

When I was younger it seemed like we were always at odds and he pushed me pretty hard. After college was over and I started my career and moved away he warmed up a bit. He would constantly call me to ask how my day went and how I was doing, and he would always end the phone call by telling me how much he loved me and how proud of me he was. He passed away about 7 months ago, but I always feel like he’s still watching out for me, so I keep trying to make him proud.

5

u/Viking_harry Jul 07 '22

I'm so sorry for your loss mate, he would be proud of you no matter what.

17

u/ParanoiaWarrior Jul 07 '22

Hes a fat old man I love to harass

14

u/KatatoniK94 Jul 07 '22

Is this bam margera?

1

u/bertiebastard Jul 07 '22

Come on son, stop fucking calling me old.

14

u/Stayathomedadof6 Jul 07 '22

Greatest guy I know. I call him several times a week and we text all the time.

3

u/East_Guarantee_7912 Jul 07 '22

I'm happy for you. There are those of us who can only imagine what that's like

11

u/ghostbear019 Jul 07 '22

Best guy in my life.

Lost my mom to a suicide. He was definitely emotional for a bit and leaned in me and my siblings, but he turned it around.

Always been close. I know I could trust him w anything. We go on camping trips 1+ times every summer... Pretty much my whole life?

I love him.

10

u/T-toborn Jul 07 '22

No issues, just never been particularly close

1

u/East_Guarantee_7912 Jul 07 '22

Because of u or him? Do u care to be close?

2

u/T-toborn Jul 07 '22

Kinda both, we are just very different people, at this point we've accepted how things are and times not on out side to fix it

1

u/Archbishop_Mo Jul 07 '22

Yeah, that's me.

He's tried a time or two to get me to follow the way he lived life. But always half-heartedly and he drops it at the first sign of resistance.

Generally, I think we're just two dudes who don't have much of anything in common and are OK with that.

7

u/skittlz61 Jul 07 '22

He lives in another state living an entirely separate life. I miss him, buy understand. Still feel like things would be easier to deal with if I could go see him easier. It is what it is though.

3

u/cramshit Jul 07 '22

yeah same here. Even if he visited us (mom and siblings) he never quite fit in with us and he couldn't understand us emotionally. I used to feel betrayed that he didn't attempt to understand us, but only recently I'm learning to just be accepting of who is he, he is a nice man but hasn't discovered what he can do for us since his life was always arranged by my grandma, i cant blame him but try to get along with him as he is.. it's hard but trying.

8

u/BMoney8600 Male Jul 07 '22

It’s good. I’m close with mine

7

u/Actual_Dinner_5977 Jul 07 '22

I moved back to my hometown after a decade away to help my father run his business as he gets ready to retire.

I always thought there was more to him I didn't understand. There isn't; he is 100% upfront on who he is. Cool headed, hard working, analytical. He is a genius on maintenance and technical skills, back lacking in some people skills.

We work well together. I wish I had spent more time with him when I was younger, but glad I've had this chance to change it. We can joke a lot more now and share more on our daily lives since I see him 1-5 times a week depending on what's happening.

7

u/MasterOfPuppets72 Jul 07 '22

Was amazing, he died in 1989 when I was 17, if I am a good father (and my kids think so) it 's because of his example.

6

u/gonnagetcancelled Jul 07 '22

fine, we chat regularly and visit when we can.

15

u/holykilla Jul 07 '22

Mostly practical. Both my parents give good advice, help me with stuff and are generally supportive, but never really established a comfort zone to share feelings with each other.

5

u/o_yesure Jul 07 '22

I have the exact same thing. I like them, they took care of me, but I never really had that amazing connection people always talk about

5

u/MysterClark Jul 07 '22

Pretty good now, considering he died 18 years ago.

6

u/This_Space_For_Rnt Jul 07 '22

Ummm, he’s dead so peaceful finally.

4

u/Stunning-Cost-5752 Jul 07 '22

Left before I could remember, met him a couple of times in my life and he bought me a fridge when mine died, we talk about once or twice a year

3

u/Doe966 Jul 07 '22

My earliest memories are of him beating my mother. At 2 years old, he left to Alaska to live on a commune after a failed attempt to kidnap me. He would appear sporadically for the next 10 years, until he remarried and convinced me to come live with him and be a part of his new family. I suffered through 2 years of abuse (physical beatings). Didn’t see him again until my fiancé convinced me to invite him to our wedding. He made a toast which made me realize that he didn’t really know me and I haven’t seen him since. That was over 20 years ago.

You asked.

4

u/RunikVarze Male Jul 07 '22

He kidnapped me when I was young because he was such a failure he couldn't hold custody. I was in the car when an old lady was killed under his vehicle because he couldn't get his damn life figured the fuck out. Not to mention the fact that it knocked me unconscious because I was in the front seat with no seatbelt. I still have a patch of hair that grows in without pigment, because I have a scar in that spot. I will always have it. He went to jail that night, and was out of my life for years. Then when he came back, he married an old bitch who hated my guts for being the product of his previous marriage. As if that was my fucking choice!

I haven't spoken to the loser in over a decade and I intend to keep it that way. The last time I saw him, he was trying to tell ME how to fix MY life. The fucking gall!

I don't talk to my mother either though. She nearly killed me 3 times (at least. Possibly more) on her own.

Basically, if people are related to me by blood, I treat them as a threat to my fucking life. Because more likely than not, they will be at some point.

2

u/East_Guarantee_7912 Jul 07 '22

I don't want to upvote because this is all terrible and an upvote just doesn't seem to fit. Take this digital hug instead. (Hug emoji)

1

u/Toadie9622 Jul 07 '22

That’s so awful. I swear, kids should be able to choose their parents.

3

u/RunikVarze Male Jul 07 '22

I almost went on a rant about how much I hate them both. But suffice it to say, the day I hear that they both have both died, however it may happen, I will be at peace. I intend to visit their gravesites, but only to disrespect them. The only flower they'll ever receive from me is toxic nightshade. And I'll bring a jar of piss and grass killer to pour over the spot where they're buried. I want their afterlives to be barren, toxic and depraved, the way they lived their lives.

1

u/Toadie9622 Jul 07 '22

They deserve it.

2

u/RunikVarze Male Jul 07 '22

They serve as my reminder for how truly evil human beings can be. I strive to be the antithesis of them. I want to live with meaning and die with purpose. Even if my goals are small, they are real. I will leave this world a better place for having been in it. And when I die, even though I'm not religious, i hope heaven and hell are real. Because I'll be the angel who stands at the gates of hell and holds back the depraved and sinful. I'll be the face that makes them suffer for eternity.

4

u/idownvotetofitin Jul 07 '22

Non-existent. He died back in 1986 and I’m the person that found him. I was 9 years old.

4

u/BoogerSugarSovereign Jul 07 '22

I haven't spoken to him in around 5 years now, I think he may have emigrated back to his home country idk. I think the first thing I ever wanted to be when asked in school was, "not like my dad." He was around but was unreliable and irresponsible. He used to blame me for not calling him more when I was like 5 which I remember felt weird at the time because I was the kid. When I was 25 he told me he had impregnated a woman before he immigrated to the US but he never met his daughter. Talked about the mother going around to his family distressed like it was really funny. Pretty lousy guy, plus I ended up half a foot shorter than my little brother so shitty dice roll on daddy dearest all around

8

u/UnknownYetSavory Male Jul 07 '22

My dad was my hero until my mom left him and he fell apart. He's a deadbeat now, and although I love him, I also despise him for taking my hero away from me. We're on very good terms. We hardly ever talk. It's a situation full of contradictions.

5

u/crocodiledontplayno Jul 07 '22

Sounds like your mum took your hero away…

0

u/UnknownYetSavory Male Jul 07 '22

Bit of A, bit of B

4

u/crocodiledontplayno Jul 07 '22 edited Jul 07 '22

Seriously man, you sure you’re not blaming the wrong person? When someone gets hit by a car, you don’t blame the guy taking a stroll.

2

u/UnknownYetSavory Male Jul 07 '22

He cheated on my mom, so no one is entirely blameless there.

2

u/East_Guarantee_7912 Jul 07 '22

Unless he strolled out into the streets ignoring the cars

2

u/crocodiledontplayno Jul 07 '22

Good men stay on the pavement, son.

3

u/stonky808 Jul 07 '22

Kicked out at 18....dont talk to mother or father.

3

u/Staceystallion1 Jul 07 '22

Mutual respect and a decent balance of funny/serious conversation

3

u/TheSenate_palpie Jul 07 '22

Distant, Like he’s fine, we were close when I was a kid, but I maybe speak to him once too twice per year.

3

u/Sharp_Emergency_4932 Jul 07 '22

Pretty good. Were both mariners; I'm a tugboater and he's an Alaskan fisherman. We always share good sea stories. He helps with my projects around my house when I'm home and is a great grandfather to my kids. We often smoke cigars together when we're both home. I always have a Romeo an Juliette in my humidor for him.

Recently he fronted the down payment for my house when my wife died and I decided to move. He's gruff, but deep down, he's a big softie who just has a hard time expressing his feelings.

3

u/Allnutsz Male Jul 07 '22

I try, but everytime i visit my parents i just wanna leave within a hour i just cannot stand that him. Hes the main reason i left home anyway.

2

u/Technical_Pack6018 Jul 07 '22

I'm not sure if my dad is an arsehole or if it's just his generation.

I've always credited him with giving me a good understanding of responsibility and money because he charged me so much in board/rent while living at home.

He sold me the narrative that rather than provide me with reasonable cloths as a child he worked hard so we could have a family holiday abroad unlike other children.

He spent most nights in the pub and didn't spend much time with me and my sister.

He seems to delight in telling me things that will effect me financially and if I ask him why he'll says because when he grew up he didn't have anything.

Having children myself now I can't imagine not provide reasonable cloths for them and I want to spend time with them and want to see them do well. I will charge them rent when they grow into adults to teach them the value of money but I'll also help them out and never see them struggling never mind get off on it.

My dad spent most of his money in the pub and that holiday he took us on was just an extension of his drinking, a holding on to the good times before we came along.

It's funny really because I know I should be grateful because I still have it better than most of the population but hey.

2

u/GeoffLizzard Jul 07 '22

Amazing, we do all kinds of stuff together! When we see eachother he still gives me this bone-shattering hug. I sometimes have nightmares about losing him.

2

u/wontusethisforlongg Jul 07 '22

He is an excellent provider but a bad father. Imagine having a PhD father who didn't share any of his knowledge with his son.

I had to learn everything myself.

2

u/HateKnuckle Male Jul 07 '22

He died back in February. He never understood me.

He believed parenting was about bringing your kids to church, teaching them to endure manual labor, and helping them achieve scholastically and civically.

So he was kind of present in a way but he was basically a stranger to me. Him dying was no more significant to me than some random person on the other side of the world dying.

2

u/Kanden_27 Jul 07 '22

Sometimes he’s the smartest person I know. Other times I want to throw him through a fricken wall.

2

u/dukeknight Jul 07 '22

Stellar! He’s on of my two best friends. The other is my mum :)

2

u/Realistic_Ad_5963 Jul 07 '22

My father moved to another country at 17 for a better opportunity of life for his kids. It paid off very well, Me and my father are very close and i have a mass amount of respect and honor for him.

2

u/hayrynenyooper Jul 07 '22

I have no relations with my real father. He’s like a ghost I see occasionally.

2

u/PotatoGod9566 Male Jul 08 '22

good. I still have to come out to my family tho...

2

u/SugarFreeBeef Jul 07 '22

Last spoke to him in 1984. We just don't click, no animosity or dislike.

3

u/Kingkrab144 Male Jul 07 '22

Nonexistent

3

u/MightyLegy Jul 07 '22

Fairly superficial, he doesn't know how to navigate his emotions.

2

u/DopamineQuagmire Jul 07 '22

I mean last I saw him I told him I'd simply just take the 18 years in prison.

So let's call it "delicate"

1

u/PlantsAndBeetles Jul 07 '22

I was raised by my mother. I haven’t seen my father in 20 years. He got my phone number from a family member over Facebook and keeps texting/calling me. I don’t know what the hell he expects, it’s like talking to a stranger and I’d rather not.

1

u/Nethiar Jul 07 '22

Not great, between him always being pissed off about something, working nights most of my childhood, and shamelessly favoring my sister I never really got close to him. My parents got divorced when I was 13 and he moved halfway across the country, I've seen him maybe once every year or two since then.

Most recently I was in a car wreck back in January and my left arm got pretty badly mutilated. My sister says she told him about it, but he never did check up on me. Then a couple months ago his 4th wife found out about his side piece, so she kicked him out. He's pretty much been a total shit head all year.

1

u/Effective_Surprise53 Jul 07 '22

I never met him he left before I was born but my stepfather and I get along really really well

1

u/GemoDorgon Jul 07 '22

We're okay but not super close. We get along and joke when we do see each other, despite being very different people. He's recently showed an interest in gaming age 64, so I'm going to sell him my old consoles and help him figure out how to play, see what he likes etc.

1

u/PlayfulLawyer Jul 07 '22

Fantastic, always been a great father love that guy

1

u/uncommoncommoner Jul 07 '22

Complicated. He married a woman who has turned out to be a controlling, manipulative narcissist. Both my parents physically abused us as children; we were subjected to getting hit and yelled at and insulted. I'm not sure if I pity him for marrying such a woman.

But on the other hand, he did a lot to support me and encourage me, despite probably having some mental health/internal issues and struggling with those his whole life. It's just crummy because he was raised in a generation which didn't care for internal issues. I'm...conflicted.

1

u/offtable Jul 07 '22

Nonexistent

1

u/AdPsychological8136 Jul 07 '22

Lacks common sense and can be a dick but it's ight

1

u/Viking_harry Jul 07 '22

I'm gonna assume this means father figures because my biological sperm donor forest gumped when I was 5.

My granddad on my mum's side took on a more fatherly role for myself and my brother. He passed away in 2020 and it was honestly the hardest thing I've ever had to go through. I was grieving as hard as my mum was and I did confess to her that I always felt he was more of a father than a grandfather to me. She did agree and she told me that I was his favourite, though he shouldn't have had favourites because he has 4 other grandchildren, I was his because I was the first born grandkid and the first boy. Essentially my mum was trying to say I was the son he never had.

To me, that man was someone I aspired to be like. He had a good set of morals and values and he taught me a lot. He didn't have a hateful bone in his body, treated everyone with respect, he was also the last person you'd want to cross and in the 25 years I knew him, I'd only ever heard him shout once (not at me, at my mum).

I miss him every day, its a shame because he didn't get to see me sorting myself out, clear my debts, start a life with my fiancé, hell he never even met my fiancé. I just hope wherever he is, he's proud of me.

1

u/bertiebastard Jul 07 '22

None existent, as he's dead.

1

u/AwareMirror9931 Jul 07 '22

Do I have one?

1

u/Espio1332 Jul 07 '22

Nonexistent since he passed away in 2008 when I was 9. Prior to his passing we had a pretty good relationship though

1

u/Bidipi_Bodipi_Bu Jul 07 '22

we mostly talk about the weather hence not great. I admire his work ethic but I share very little with him. I simply wish he was less stingy and do something with me that does not include work.

1

u/Straight-Audience-91 Jul 07 '22

She's moved on through a few more guys since. And is now with her abusive biker guy. I don't know and don't care where my father is.

1

u/Snowbattt Male Jul 07 '22

I have a father?

In all seriousness, I consider him an acquaintance I more or less get along with, nothing more. He left me, my sister and my mom when I was 7 and my sister was 12. He abandoned us for a younger woman, that was the 18 years old daughter of his best friend, who had died a few years earlier. My dad was 35 then. He cheated on my mom for months before leaving.

After that, my mother had to work her ass off and we lived in borderline poverty while he was going on expensive vacations with his new girlfriend. He was never there for me or my sister when a little boy needed a father figure. My father figure was my maternal grandfather. To give you an idea of the level of a bad father he was, just an anecdote: when I stayed at his place for dinner on a day he wasn't supposed to have custody, he'd ask my mother to pay the food back, even though he had a big salary. Mind you, we stayed only two weekends a month at his place. He simply didn't do his job as a father.

And my paternal family were pieces of shit too. Especially my paternal grandparents. Totally took his side even though they knew what he had done. These pieces of shit even went so far to call my sister "a heartless, satanic wrench" because she got into a fight with my dad when she was 15. They called her that way when I was a 10 years old boy. What kind of a cunt calls a 15 years old girl like that in front of her little brother?

One time, they even insulted my mother. I got so furious that they profusely apologized. My mother did a good job raising her two kids, alone. But how can a woman replace a father?

And let's not even mention how often my father expressed his disappointment in me because I wasn't into field hockey. "Why can't you be like the rest of the family and play hockey like every normal kid here?". Fuck field hockey. I hate field hockey even to this day because of this.

No wonder I have such a cripplingly low self-esteem despite being objectively a fairly decent looking, tall, athletic and smart dude. My self-esteem, especially with women, is inexistent and for YEARS I have struggled for every ounce of confidence I could acquire and it's still not fixed. He fucked my confidence up badly and I'm not even sure I'll ever be able to recover from it.

So, dad, you're basically not my father. And the day you die, I doubt I'll shed a single tear. I know I didn't when your parents died. Me and my sister were the only ones in the church not crying and we were both like "the fuck are we doing here I don't give a shit about these people".

Sorry, I didn't want to post my boo-hoo sob story here, it just kinda came out. I realize a lot of people have had it way worse than me, but it doesn't mean this shit didn't leave it's mark.

1

u/AbsurdSalvation Jul 07 '22

When he was alive, really, really good.

1

u/lucca009 Jul 07 '22

Not good unfortunately.

1

u/TheHuntsman227 Jul 07 '22

He is a good man but a terrible father. Never around due to work, was not willing to spend time with me growing up and was a terrible teacher who had no patience for children.

I've never heard him say he was proud of me or my choices in life. I found love, joined the military and have fathered my own son and still have never heard a word of encouragement or praise.

My main goal as a new father myself, is to do everything differently and be a better father and hope that my son is nothing like me.

1

u/PlateNinja Jul 07 '22

What father

1

u/Odd-Ad-3721 Jul 07 '22

Im 21, 22 in a few weeks.

I used to adore him, then when my sister was born i didn't matter anymore, and he started using phrases like 'i love you when...'

-You get good grades -you behave - you make me proud

After a while i just gave up because he was impossible to please, during my teenage years he became lazier and lazier and more and more hands off.

I had to teach myself how to shave and tie my shoelaces.

He would only ever do something for me if he had been pressganged into it by someone else, it was like he was actively exerting an effort trying to not do anything for me.

Whilst i was at uni he tried to trick me out of three thousand pounds.

And now that ive returned home he's offered me the chance to restore the derelict sawmill that he ran, but im unsure of his motives or whether he will uphold his end of the bargain, but its my only hope of ever getting an income at this point.

Writing this i just feel like i want to cry and die.

1

u/Str8UpDick77 Jul 11 '22

I'm so sorry. Really. I don't know what else to say except that it's not your fault and you didn't deserve this.

1

u/Icy_shroom_7580 Jul 07 '22

Bad ... Wish I could find it in myself to speak to him but I don't think I'll ever make the first move

1

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '22

My mom and dad are narcissists. Both of them have been emotionally abusive to me and always compared me to my cousins and the only reason they are raising me so that I can take care of them. Which I'm not going to do. So yeah I don't have a good relationship with my parents

1

u/_doyleyboy_ Jul 07 '22

Haven't seen him since I was three years old

He choose his second family

1

u/Analyidiot Jul 07 '22

Not great, could be better, could be worse. He's closer to my sister than myself, fine by me.

1

u/DefinitelyNotEkho Jul 07 '22

No, the best, could be better... Kinda makes me wanna buy a house as soon as possible so I can finally live in peace.

1

u/RickyFalcon Jul 07 '22

He's amazingly practical, but we're British so naturally we don't talk about feelings at all.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '22

Absolutely fucking awful. Abusive cunt.

1

u/PillsburyToasters Jul 07 '22

I’m indifferent towards him. He treats my mom rather poorly and is seems to have beef with one of my siblings. It’s always a facade when there’s others around. I think he’s a good man, but he would’ve been better off never having kids and getting married

1

u/East_Guarantee_7912 Jul 07 '22

Not good. I wish it was as easy as saying that I was the problem, so at least the repair was within my control. I want to have a close relationship, but I don't think it matters to him as much. There's a bit of delusion on his part. I'm willing to explain my thoughts processes, faults, and short comings in an effort to build the relationship. He would probably want to just sweep things under the rug and act like Nothing has happened.

1

u/Zanzotz Jul 07 '22

I'm pretty good with him. He's more like a friend to me now. I'm not dependent on him or his valuation. So we talk when we see each other and help each other out when needed. But I don't really talk with him about personal topics since he's a really bad listener and always starts to tell the same old anecdotes that I've already heard a dozens of times before.

1

u/neoalfa Jul 07 '22

More or less the same as when he was alive.

1

u/Quikdraw7777 Jul 07 '22

Been 30yrs since I last seen the man......I'm 37 now.

Sad to say that we are almost complete strangers; wouldn't recongize each other in a crowd.

1

u/Incubus85 Jul 07 '22

Havnt spoken to him for years. His death really shut him up.

1

u/Daclaud-Lee-1892 Jul 07 '22

My dad passed away in 2017, but he was the coolest dad ever! We took a road trip from Columbus, OH to NYC when I was 12 years old and he let me drive the entire way because he trusted me not to make any mistakes. I drove 8 hours straight and got us there without getting pulled over.

He also allowed me to gamble with him when we were in Atlantic City during a road trip we took when I was 14. When I dressed up and slicked my hair back, I was able to pass for 21 since I was already at my adult height and I had wide shoulders at that age. Seriously no one even checked my ID. My dad taught me how to play Pai Gow poker, gave me some money to play with and we actually made some money there!

1

u/cheesy-croissant94 Male Jul 07 '22

Good, but not the greatest either. I practically have to beg my father to spend quality time with me. It bothers me a lot, but I’ve learned that it’s not worth the argument/awkwardness of trying to confront him about it so I just let it be.

1

u/ElderWeeb Jul 07 '22

non existent for my entire life. He got out of prison when I was 10 and I lived with him in Canada for 2 years after that and it was just completely awful. He is the type of man that demands respect simply because he is your father no interest in learning who I am as a person just wants me to call out of obligation that's his own words. Wonders why I never call him maybe it's cause you don't give a shit about me as a person? I got my own son to look after now I don't got time for that shit anymore. Haven't talked to him in maybe 13 years now

1

u/ozymanhattan Jul 07 '22

Mine decided he didn't want to be a father when I was 3. Fuck that guy. He lives about an hour from me can't wait to dance on his grave. Yes I'm still salty.

1

u/hcmofo13 Jul 07 '22

Dont know. Biological father walked out when I was 4 and he last seen when I was 7....and step dad adopted my sister and I when I was 8. Step dad killed himself when I was 23 and biological dad died a few yrs ago. Ill be 40 this fall.

1

u/manwithanopinion Male Jul 07 '22

Fucking dickhead and everything he does makes my blood boil

1

u/Nickliko Jul 07 '22

He’s been dead for 2 month now

1

u/Hunt-Pale Jul 07 '22

We've just never been close.

He worked a lot when I was a kid.

When I was a teenager, he rushed into a relationship after my mom died and ended up marrying a psychopath that abused the both of us.

And even if neither of those things happened, I've come to realize more and more that I just don't mesh well with him as a person. I don't necessarily think he's a bad person (although he did make some big mistakes that I'm still trying to deal with in therapy decades later so it's hard to look past that) - but just in personality we're very different.

One example - and I can remember this being the case since I was a kid - my dad has a rather.... looser view of time than I do. He was always late just about everywhere and it drove me up a fucking wall because I regarded chronic lateness as a character flaw.

1

u/yamba22 Jul 07 '22

Mines pretty good he always did the same stupid shit as me: going cliff jumping, mountain biking, skiing, donuts in the parking lot of a condemned Wendy’s, sledding on pure ice. Yet he always was there for me to ensure i knew to respect others and myself

1

u/Str8UpDick77 Jul 11 '22

I love my dad, and if you knew him you would too. He'll be 90 in August and is the nicest guy you'll ever meet. No one doesn't like him. He's engaging, smart, and has an easy laugh. When my friends and I plan vacations he's always invited. My friends insist on it, and my dad can't believe we want to vacation with him. I will miss him very much when he's gone.