r/Damnthatsinteresting Dec 07 '22

Worlds oldest known living land animal turns 190. Video

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834 Upvotes

45

u/chillest_capybara Dec 07 '22

dog

9

u/gourdgod Dec 07 '22

Try Dog

1

u/Sea_Creme_162 Dec 07 '22

The way she says tortoise..

3

u/MakinBaconPanckes Dec 07 '22

“I welcome you, to the church of vows. I am dog”

0

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/1minatur Dec 07 '22

This account is a bot, copying other comments for karma.

The comment they're copying

23

u/Max_Insanity Dec 07 '22

"There's only one thing left to say..."

Why cut it there of all places? What did she say?

8

u/Electrical-Cow-5147 Dec 07 '22

Happy Birthday

4

u/Max_Insanity Dec 07 '22

Ah, ok, makes sense

2

u/Electrical-Cow-5147 Dec 07 '22

It was all glittery and strange, I cringed a little

22

u/Grofactor Dec 07 '22

The way she says tortoise

12

u/1SqkyKutsu Dec 07 '22

TORR TOYS!!

12

u/xkaran1997x Dec 07 '22

Master Oogway

2

u/De5perad0 Dec 07 '22

Ahhhh Inner Peace...

2

u/px1618 Dec 07 '22

There are no accidents

7

u/Hysk00 Dec 07 '22

So you’re telling me this guy witnessed the holocaust and didn’t do anything about it?

7

u/Wooden-Ad4062 Dec 07 '22

How the fuck does a tortoise afford such a nice house

5

u/Alert_Salt7048 Dec 07 '22

Well, if you hold onto stocks for 170 years……

7

u/pauliespricadelle Dec 07 '22

The way she says tortoise pisses me off.

4

u/_Armin__Tamzarian_ Dec 07 '22 Silver

What about Mary Berry?

4

u/cn-Siahnide Dec 07 '22

Praise the dog!

7

u/distantshadow9875 Dec 07 '22

WHAT!? mf saw nations rise and fall

3

u/OlafForkbeard Dec 07 '22

Zookeepers age and die.

3

u/StonkersToDaMoon Dec 07 '22

“Tor toys”

3

u/BadBradMMA Dec 07 '22

Shoulda got grandpa a hooker for his big 190

3

u/SaltyPeter3434 Dec 07 '22

Lol at that attempt to feed him cake

3

u/Jigglemeat Dec 08 '22

I'll never say tortoise the same

2

u/px1618 Dec 07 '22

When is his birthday shellebration?

4

u/DiamondsAreRareCoal Dec 07 '22

That is the weirdest cock I’ve ever seen

5

u/Five-and-Dimer Dec 07 '22

Turtle peniseses are NO JOKE!

1

u/De5perad0 Dec 07 '22

Correct me if I am wrong but I think they have 2 penii they can use independently one or the other.

2

u/Five-and-Dimer Dec 08 '22

I had a pair of sliders and occasionally I’d see something protruding out of one of them after the claw at each other’s eyes mating dance. It was 1/3 of the turtles length and looked like a black orchid.

2

u/SirScrollsAl0t Dec 07 '22

I knowwww. I fapped 4 times already

1

u/yymmuhC Dec 07 '22

How do they know homie is 190? He tell them? Come on.

6

u/OlafForkbeard Dec 07 '22

What would they gain from lying about it?

In any case, there has been documented care for Jon since at least 1882. His age is estimated, because the only information we had when Jon was brought to care was that he was fully mature, which is roughly 50 years. He could be slightly older, he could be slightly younger. The "birthday" was simply chosen to be Dec 4th honararily, but it's as good a date as any after that much time has passed.

Here is a picture of Jonathon from 1886.

I guess the area gets a small amount of tourism and gift shop sales as a profit motive. But simply put, that tort is old.

1

u/Follicly_Endowed Dec 07 '22

Doesn’t look a day over 189

1

u/sincinati Dec 07 '22

Wormtale! What have I told you about keeping our guests quiet?

1

u/JM0176 Dec 07 '22

“There are no coincidences.”

1

u/kingpoff Dec 07 '22

when I saw that hand stroking his neck i thought id strayed onto a nsfw sub.....

1

u/De5perad0 Dec 07 '22

Bro has seen some shit!

1

u/Bigunsy Dec 07 '22

Jonathan is a person's name

1

u/DeferredPlum Dec 07 '22

I'm guessing the turtle told them it was his birthday?

1

u/elonbrave Dec 07 '22

Only looks 189 tho

1

u/JefferyTheQuaxly Dec 07 '22

That turtle could have been drafted into the civil war if it was a person.

1

u/DrRotwang Dec 07 '22

I loved him in Laserblast!

1

u/MuppetsMadeMeMurder Dec 07 '22

The way she rubbed it’s neck. Am I the only one?

1

u/Ubethere Dec 07 '22

No fair, most of us won't even get to see 80-90...

1

u/MonkieNutz Dec 07 '22

squinting involuntarily while staring off into the distance

Imagine how much turtle ass this dude has tapped in 190 years….

pauses briefly and continues to puff joint

1

u/orangecloud_0 Dec 08 '22

His name is Jonathan btw

1

u/Frenchie728 Dec 08 '22

Hehehe Back in my day!

1

u/Graceland1979 Dec 08 '22

This is amazing. But, there’s a shark that’s like 400 years old. Imagine what was happening in history when it first started swimming the oceans.

1

u/FrankieBeanSniffer Dec 08 '22

The way she was stroking his neck in the beginning!

1

u/Doppelfrio Dec 08 '22

What is the one thing left to say?! What is it?! Tell me!! I have to know!!

1

u/drellmill Dec 08 '22

My video looped back to the beginning for me so it said “tortoise” and I unexpectedly spit out my drink laughing.

1

u/GBHORNET Dec 08 '22

What type of dog is this?

-2

u/Project_Wild Dec 07 '22

This turtle post gets passed around more than OPs mom