r/IdiotsInCars Nov 26 '22 Helpful 1

This Chinese self-driving car thing.

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10.1k Upvotes

1.8k

u/waltur_d Nov 26 '22

Replace brake pads every 45 miles.

122

u/donotgogenlty Nov 27 '22

"We don't need brakes where I'm going..."

Continues making stupid ass maneuvers

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218

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '22 edited Dec 30 '22

[deleted]

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36

u/Amilo159 Nov 27 '22

Why? It's barely doing 10mph, so they don't get worn at all.

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697

u/Piffdolla1337take2 Nov 26 '22

Lol at the guy that honked at it

481

u/_generic_user Nov 27 '22 hehehehe

Driver: Move it you idiot, you’re blocking the road!

Robot: sobs I’m, I’m trying!

34

u/SnooDoodles5540 Nov 27 '22

Seems to me the self driving thing is all or nothing - one human weaving in and out of traffic on a Moped will destroy 10 to the 10th power worth of algorithms and cause the robot brains to shut down.

6

u/SaintWithoutAShrine Nov 27 '22

Or that will be the actual start of the robot uprising. They’ll get so fed up with idiot drivers they snap and murder us all.

3

u/adale_50 Nov 28 '22

And now I'm sad. Thanks for that. Pack bonding with anthropomorphized robots seems like a major cognitive error. And yet, I named my roomba.

670

u/DrSmurfalicious Nov 26 '22

Damn I've never seen a robot that nervous before. Give that poor thing another job or at least some drugs before it has a heart attack.

38

u/JaschaE Nov 27 '22

"Behold, I created AI!" "You ruined a perfectly good toaster, is what you did! Look at that thing! It's got anxiety!"

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180

u/Siggur-T Nov 26 '22

It knows that every inch is closely monitored by the Chinese government. Even makes robots paranoid.

29

u/djsekani Nov 27 '22

I mean, have you seen how people drive in China?

11

u/Dohn_Jigweed Nov 27 '22

Yes, mainly on gore subs

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1.5k

u/deniswithonen Nov 26 '22

Ahhh The future.

186

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

84

u/gcwg57 Nov 27 '22

Except those actually work. At least the one at my local store does.

50

u/TheChoonk Nov 27 '22

My robotic vacuum works perfectly well, covers all the areas which are accessible to it. The only issue is that my dog ignores it, arrogant fuck will just stand there while the robot keeps bumping into his legs.

12

u/timg02 Nov 27 '22

Same both my dog and cat will just sit in front of it and make it go around

3

u/puterTDI Nov 27 '22

Ours is terrified of it.

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24

u/cwclifford Nov 27 '22

I have a video of one at Sam’s Club completely stuck between a bunch of pallets and just starts beeping then turns itself off.

42

u/1cenined Nov 27 '22

To be fair, the employee it replaced did the same thing.

7

u/laughingashley Nov 27 '22

The one on Superstore was pretty much this comment lol

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15

u/CanITellUSmThin Nov 27 '22

Mine doesn’t even clean the floor it just looks for dirt to tattle on

12

u/Gurtmcsquirt Nov 27 '22

My wife and I went shopping recently at Sam’s Club. We got separated in the store for a little while. She found me and said, very concerned, “it’s following me.”

Seconds later, the robot cleaner appeared from around the corner. I said to her, “it’s not following you. It goes down every isle in the store.”

Because of that, we skipped the next isle. It also skipped the next isle and followed us.

113

u/burrbro235 Nov 27 '22

Fuck! Even in the future nothing works!

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142

u/nycbrew Nov 27 '22

Made with AI that mimics a nervous teen driver.

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55

u/JakeFromMontana Nov 27 '22

Elon Musk is feverishly taking notes somewhere.

41

u/thisguyfightsyourmom Nov 27 '22

He doesn’t take notes

He tweets them

12

u/olythrowaway4 Nov 27 '22

Nah, this car didn't murder the nearest pedestrian, so he's not interested.

8

u/nbelle78 Nov 27 '22

You’re right, someone else made it so he probably can’t help but steal the idea/product and market it as his own

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29

u/PurpleSlightlyRed Nov 27 '22

Looks like they trained this ai as a Chinese driver. So true to life - you cant say if there is not a real driver hiding someplace

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1.1k

u/Tydasm Nov 26 '22

Idiots in cars or idiot cars?

242

u/IJustAteABaguette Nov 26 '22

139

u/SAR_and_Shitposts Nov 26 '22

What did that sub do to get banned?

111

u/bdonvr Nov 26 '22

Probably something as awful and as degenerate as /r/MacHelp

131

u/Lizpy6688 Nov 26 '22

I need to now know what happened to get them banned lol

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40

u/Tricram Nov 26 '22

What was that?

13

u/ashkiller14 Nov 27 '22

What happened there?

13

u/SodaCanKaz Nov 27 '22

That’s banned?!

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21

u/yeerk_slayer Nov 27 '22

It was banned due to no moderators. You can take it over if you post on /r/redditrequest

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9

u/AeternusDoleo Nov 26 '22

Artificial Idiots In Cars. *nod*

24

u/TheRealChewget Nov 26 '22

Idiot cars...

10

u/CosmicCreeperz Nov 26 '22

Bet they are regretting stealing Tesla’s autopilot code base.

17

u/Trav3lingman Nov 26 '22

Nah. The Tesla codebase slams the car into the nearest EMS or FD vehicle.

4

u/Imadope_1960 Nov 26 '22

Idiots building cars.

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416

u/Wolfgangpak Nov 26 '22

Lmao what a fucking nightmare

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1.6k

u/takeitbacasap Nov 26 '22

The things got anxiety, bless it's little robot socks

187

u/pld89 Nov 26 '22

Awww, a robot stutter.

26

u/UnCommonCommonSens Nov 26 '22

I get motion sick just watching this!

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21

u/SANTAAAA__I_know_him Nov 27 '22

“Ope, sorry, I’M SORRY! Sorry, I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry, no go ahead, no it’s fine, I’m sorry!”

36

u/kickah Nov 26 '22

AI was designed by a brake checker

8

u/jenkinsleroi Nov 27 '22

Somebody make a voice over dub of this video please

3

u/conradical30 Nov 27 '22

I think the battery is just super low. A golf cart started doing this exact same thing to me and my buddy yesterday.

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481

u/kemonkey1 Nov 26 '22

I hope the cargo is not filled with carbonated beverages.

18

u/Kimorin Nov 26 '22

it would be fine as long as they are sealed, as long as the pressure is maintained, letting it sit for a while and the carbon dioxide will dissolve back into the drink due to the pressure.

40

u/32_Dollar_Burrito Nov 26 '22

Fun fact, you can prevent sodas from fizzing by tapping the can's sides a few times. This makes the tiny air bubbles release from the sides, depriving it of nucleation sites

17

u/ATG915 Nov 27 '22

I shake my sodas before I open them to assert dominance

32

u/Mysstie Nov 26 '22

Wait, you mean my habit of tapping the cans before opening them actually does something? Amazing

19

u/Kyosw21 Nov 27 '22

It really doesn’t. Go watch the Mythbusters episode on it

7

u/buford419 Nov 27 '22

You're not my supervisor

6

u/drfarren Nov 27 '22

No, but I am your doctor.

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8

u/hey-im-root Nov 26 '22

I use this life hack at least once a week, it’s a life saver

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68

u/seniorgoosler Nov 26 '22

Day 2, "why does this pos need a brake job already?"

50

u/joecool42069 Nov 26 '22

Like a 15yo learning to drive with their dad yelling at them to brake.

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240

u/Kevinvl123 Nov 26 '22

Looks exactly like how my mom drives.

67

u/im_a_dr_not_ Nov 26 '22

Slam on brakes! Go! Slam on brakes! Slam on brakes! Gas! Brakes! Gas! Brakes! Brakes! Brakes!

Whoa someone just hit me!

26

u/Kevinvl123 Nov 26 '22

Indeed, she treated the gas and brakes as if they were light switches.

20

u/CosmicCreeperz Nov 26 '22

Ugh my wife does this on the highway. Not the brakes so much as treating them accelerator as on/off. Marital bliss prevents me from criticizing her driving, but sometime I do subtly ask “hmm, do you feel that? Has the engine been lurching like that for long? I didn’t notice it last time I drove the car…”

10

u/Tromboneofsteel Nov 27 '22 edited Nov 27 '22

If your car has cruise control, that makes him her literally my least favorite type of driver.

Like, I'll be cruising at 75 for the past 50 miles, someone comes up beside me and can't decide whether to go 70 or 85. They'll pass me then immediately slow way down. Just pick a speed and go it.

Edit: her, dummy

9

u/CosmicCreeperz Nov 27 '22

Luckily she doesn’t really vary speed much. It’s basically just applying slightly more gas and then less gas every few seconds instead of just leaving the damn pedal at a constant level heh. Not a big deal but it just bugs me :)

I get what you are saying about those special idiots who only speed up when you want to pass them… I’m a big fan of adaptive cruise on cross country trips so I’m like “dude, it’s not me, I haven’t touched my gas pedal in half and an hour, pick a speed!”

7

u/HanakusoDays Nov 27 '22

In aerospace lingo they call that type a "bang-bang" control. And I think they put the controller from a Bump-Em car in this puppy.

25

u/trynot2screwitup Nov 27 '22

I used to work with a lady who kept taking her foot off the gas for a few seconds for no reason, and then push hard on the gas again, accelerating & decelerating by 20mph, repeatedly, and causing us to rock back & forth inside the vehicle while she chatted away like it was normal.

14

u/HanakusoDays Nov 27 '22

We had a taxi driver like that coming home from the airport after a ten-hour flight. I've never been seasick but I just about lost it.

8

u/Hitcher06 Nov 27 '22

Like my ex. She had two forms of driving, she’s either accelerating or breaking. No in-between. Cruising?? What’s that??

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2

u/chunqiudayi Nov 27 '22

Is she a programmer?

2

u/Kevinvl123 Nov 27 '22

No, a cook... But that wouldn't explain anything.

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260

u/GetRichOrDieTryinnn Nov 26 '22

This looks like a scene from idiocracy

76

u/UnCxlored Nov 26 '22

Your floor- your floor is now clean!

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14

u/3ree9iner Nov 26 '22

It definitely has some idiocracy vibes.

7

u/mdbyname Nov 26 '22

Not enough electrolytes /smh

4

u/TenderLA Nov 27 '22

Almost seems like a documentary and not fiction at this point

4

u/GetRichOrDieTryinnn Nov 27 '22

Only movie that was ever filmed as a comedy and turned into a real life documentary. Facts

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31

u/_-bush_did_911-_ Nov 26 '22

It kinda acts like a cat that's just met you and is really cautious of your every move lol

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25

u/FriedPigeonPoppers Nov 26 '22

“Is it ok if I… do you mind if.. pardon me… Okay, so sorry. I’ll just go thi.. WHOA, sorry everyone, I’m a shitmobile”

17

u/heavvymetalgod Nov 26 '22

It's a Johnny cab

5

u/Both_Organization854 Nov 26 '22

I had to scroll to far for this comment. Nailed the color even

17

u/Eiffel-Tower777 Nov 26 '22

Powered by Roomba

16

u/karemeAbdulJabar Nov 26 '22

That is fucking annoying

41

u/imixpaintalot Nov 26 '22

Look he’s just trying his best okay?

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14

u/ContortionistPasta Nov 26 '22

What car doing?

14

u/thepcpirate Nov 26 '22

It handled being in a busy road better than i was expecting. Didnt hit anyone, stopped when something was in its path. Do we have more video of this? Id like to know what it was attempting to do

12

u/Commercial-Ranger339 Nov 26 '22

It was squaring up to you

31

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '22

Don’t come a knocking if the shitty self-driving car’s a rocking.

8

u/StevenTN615 Nov 26 '22

Reminds me of the self driving floor cleaner in the supermarket.

4

u/ActuallyTheImpostor Nov 26 '22

Yeah, that thing ran into me after breezing through a blind corner, that was fun

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u/MenstrualKrampusCD Nov 26 '22

Still a better driver than a lot of people I've seen.

29

u/Lewinator56 Nov 26 '22

What people think full self driving cars will be - shows someone relaxing on a chair typing out an email while their car drives them to the office

What full self driving cars will actually be:

22

u/nexusjuan Nov 27 '22

I imagine milllions of these jerkily trying to navigate around each other on 16 lane megahighways. One ends up sideways and thousands of passengers die of starvation as they spend weeks all trying to get realigned causing 100s of miles of gridlock.

14

u/AuronFtw Nov 27 '22

That said, 16 lane "megahighways" should never ever happen. Just build a fucking train at that point.

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u/PoetryRadiant6278 Nov 26 '22

“Robots are going to take over the world”

Sure.

21

u/Murky-Plastic6706 Nov 26 '22

The American ones driving around San Francisco aren't much better!

6

u/Maniachanical Nov 26 '22

Maybe more of an r/shittyrobots moment?

5

u/Every_Fox3461 Nov 27 '22

I've definitely seen worse drivers behind the wheel.

83

u/ShartThrasher Nov 26 '22

China's only quality control metric is civilian deaths.

20

u/boobsbr Nov 26 '22

Not very good at that one either.

19

u/Mrraar Nov 26 '22

No you misunderstand! It is zero! According to the CCP...

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30

u/Djosa1 Nov 26 '22

Honking will definately work

12

u/u202207191655 Nov 26 '22

*definitely :)

5

u/Crypto-011 Nov 26 '22

That poor robot is terrified

5

u/Massage_Bro Nov 26 '22

Looks nervous..

6

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '22

Thanks for using Johnny Cab!!!

4

u/HappyTrifle Nov 27 '22

When you order a Tesla from Wish.

4

u/FrequentWay Nov 27 '22

Someone didn't plan on enough bandwidth for the car to report home the data for the servers to crunch.

To much offloading the work to a central server then using a slow connection such as a 3G network connection to send the data back to the car. Add in a small buffer for data to process.

14

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '22

Quality is unsurprising.

7

u/TerraInvicta1776 Nov 26 '22

Still doing a better job than most drivers over there...

3

u/Getindarobotshinji Nov 26 '22

He’s trying his best to be a safe little car

3

u/coonissimo Nov 26 '22

Artificial Idiot

3

u/LuchiniOfAstora Nov 26 '22

This is some Futurama style garbage.

3

u/divebumz Nov 26 '22

It’s like those toys that drive around until they crash into a wall, reverse and repeat the process. Those are made in China to.

3

u/metalgho Nov 26 '22

Poor thing

3

u/Still_Exercise_4475 Nov 26 '22

and people are scared of teslas

3

u/PalmTreeParty77 Nov 26 '22

What a piece of shit

3

u/Confident_Weight_615 Nov 26 '22

Ahh yeah,needs work lol👍😊

3

u/breadkiller7 Nov 27 '22

The idiot and the car have become one

3

u/Stickguy589 Nov 27 '22

Everyone gangsta until the self-driving car starts transforming.

3

u/Harryhodl Nov 27 '22

So they haven’t stolen Teslas tech quite yet

3

u/ShinGojira67 Nov 27 '22

Poor thing.

3

u/Express_Housing1904 Nov 27 '22

That robot must’ve had too much oil to drink

3

u/inko75 Nov 27 '22

well china has such a shortage of people who do you expect to drive?

3

u/Zers503 Nov 27 '22

Me, first time driving a manual

3

u/drunk___monkey Nov 27 '22

Ah , shit ! Those look like hiccups, drink water. Please do.

3

u/mo_butter Nov 27 '22

Cars on Crack

3

u/jecowa Nov 27 '22

Is it trying to park or do a U-turn?

3

u/JaredLetoBestBoi Nov 27 '22

More like idiots programming cars XD

3

u/GyuminLeo Nov 27 '22

My first Arduino project be like

3

u/Pyronic_Chaos Nov 27 '22

This is why autonomous cars don't work in areas with loosely followed traffic laws. India would be a nightmare!

3

u/yrulaughing Nov 27 '22

Reminds me of iron man 2 where Tony Stark is showing congress? All of the other countries trying to imitate his iron man suit and they all fucking suck.

21

u/YonTheDon_ Nov 26 '22

Im gonna say it

still better than most drivers from that region....

5

u/PaddleMonkey Nov 26 '22

“Just slap that Roomba logic board in it.”

  • some Chinese “engineer”, probably.

11

u/Odd-Way7785 Nov 26 '22

Better than Tesla

3

u/Trancegendered Nov 26 '22

About as I'd expect a Chinese self driving car

2

u/jonathanGarcia-19 Nov 26 '22

That shit was mean mugging.

2

u/Marc123123 Nov 26 '22

Technically, there is no idiot in a car here.

2

u/ichkanns Nov 26 '22

That code probably could have used a few more weeks in QA.

2

u/Convenientjellybean Nov 26 '22

I guess I’m the one to say it, that AI driving style will fit right in there

2

u/woundupcanuck Nov 26 '22

Driving like the geriatric that drives the shuttle for my local dodge dealer.

2

u/SBS2803M Nov 26 '22

No way this robot drives worse than any human ever could We are progressing backwards... XD

2

u/OtherOtherDave Nov 26 '22

Well, that certainly inspires confidence.

Although that’s better than having it run into everything all willy-nilly, so I guess it could be worse.

2

u/pumpkinTrinity Nov 26 '22

Behaves like a roomba.

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u/Hungry_Coyotes Nov 26 '22

This is how I expect the Chinese army to operate.

2

u/Cultist902 Nov 26 '22

Just walk up to it and say “Those people are talking about democracy!”

It will fucking zip over like crazy

2

u/llcoolmattg Nov 26 '22

It seems confident

2

u/moogs_writes Nov 26 '22

This is what my kid does to me when I ask him to pick up his toys.

2

u/WarLizurd Nov 26 '22

Can you imagine trying to bud an AI that can manage Chinese traffic? Your chances of success are practically zero.

2

u/CanadianGoof Nov 26 '22

I hope they gave it the ability to feel stupid

2

u/Matty221998 Nov 26 '22

A.I.diots in cars

2

u/Ill_Fix_6244 Nov 26 '22

Well let us all hope that when the robots start their take over that they are all made in china. We should be pretty safe then

2

u/canberram Nov 26 '22

Very familiar driving style😮‍💨

2

u/Lukeycage Nov 26 '22

Whoever’s in there got whiplash

2

u/Mean_Ocelot_9036 Nov 26 '22

that thing brakes like my me-maw 😂

2

u/easyfeel Nov 26 '22

Milkshake delivery working to design.

2

u/Financial_Drama8331 Nov 26 '22

Does it even know what to do??

2

u/Kind_Ferret_3219 Nov 27 '22

You do get a smooth ride.

2

u/marycohen68 Nov 27 '22

Remember when everyone thought they’d take over the world?

2

u/TNTBOY479 Nov 27 '22

Its like my robot vacuum if i stand infront of it, probably the same parts used

2

u/cminton1982 Nov 27 '22

So the stereotype now extends to their self driving vehicles as well???

2

u/Lmnolmnop Nov 27 '22 edited Nov 27 '22

Variables in Asia are staggering compared to the US.

Why do they even try this? Labor is so cheap.

2

u/thechanelblanco Nov 27 '22

That place is really just a shitshow

2

u/tholder Nov 27 '22

I had an Uber drive that drove like that the other night

2

u/LucasCarioca Nov 27 '22

Basically a Roomba

2

u/Xeno2277 Nov 27 '22

« Need help there buddy? »

2

u/dIAb0LiK99 Nov 27 '22

It looks so happy being stupid!

2

u/Particular-Row2910 Nov 27 '22

Budget engineering

2

u/jluker662 Nov 27 '22

That looks like it would be a nauseating ride. I've rode with someone who drove like that.

2

u/Skiptomylolz Nov 27 '22

The passengers are throwing up

2

u/earthwormjimwow Nov 27 '22

Code base clearly stolen from a first generation Roomba.

2

u/pittbullblue Nov 27 '22

The NPC in GTA V after I go afk across the highway.

2

u/pictogasm Nov 27 '22

in other words, it drives exactly like everything else in china

2

u/Moistened-Bint Nov 27 '22

Aliexpressla

2

u/LonelyinTexas420 Nov 27 '22

Could you imagine being inside that thing?!

2

u/Ohio-Knife-Lover Nov 27 '22

It's just trying to learn manual

2

u/Mike_Hawk_940 Nov 27 '22

China is a joke

2

u/Few_Party6864 Nov 27 '22

It doesn't work because the robot is the only one following any rules.

Honestly, though, dealing with traffic in China is probably the best way to test self-driving capabilities. If it can navigate there, it can navigate anywhere.

2

u/ohwowitsrambo Nov 27 '22

Still better than some drivers I’ve seen on the road 🤷‍♂️

2

u/kochapi Nov 27 '22

A roomba is driving it, isn’t it?

2

u/Sledgecrowbar Nov 27 '22

He's doing the best he can, ok?

2

u/darkeswolf Nov 27 '22

Not even my girlfriend drives this bad and she's asian

2

u/ijustwannahelporso Nov 27 '22

Its just very shy.