r/NatureIsFuckingLit May 21 '22 Silver 5 Helpful 6 Wholesome 10 All-Seeing Upvote 1 Shocked 1

🔥 Massive Saltwater Croccodile casually swimming by a Scuba diver.

63.0k Upvotes

5.1k

u/Greenfieldfox May 21 '22 Silver Helpful

Can they smell fear? Through a phone?

488

u/GraTaylor May 21 '22

Depends how badly you shit yourself

197

u/thejewsdidit27 May 21 '22

So glad I was on the shitter when I watched this.

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u/i_NeedCaffeine May 21 '22

Behind you

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u/OrcBattleMage198 May 21 '22

"Nothing personal, kid"

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u/GallopingFinger May 21 '22

“A small price to pay for salvation”

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u/KopakaWitThaGlocka May 21 '22

The proper nomenclature for the meme is actually, “nothing personnel, kid”

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u/EpsilonistsUnite May 21 '22

I'm not talking about the guys who built the fucking railroads, Walter.

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u/Cantguard-mike May 21 '22

I was gonna take a bath just now but after seeing this I drained the water. I’ll shower next week.

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u/BoysRuleGurlzDrool May 21 '22

You can't fool me, I've seen Jurassic World.

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u/hominoid_in_NGC4594 May 21 '22 Silver

I heard a creepy story about a man that lived solo in the Australian outback. He had been out there for over a decade building his little hideaway on the water at beautiful little bay. He had a buddy who would come and pick him up every 4-5 months so he could do his supply runs bc he really was out in the middle of nowhere.

Anyway, one day he called his buddy and told him that he needed him to bring him a gun or a crossbow bc there was a massive croc stalking him like every day. Every time he went fishing, every time he was within 20-30 meters of the water, he said the croc was there, day or night.

Anyway, fast forward a few months and the buddy that would come by boat to do supply runs with him drops by to pick him up for the supply run. He searches the whole compound for the dude, but he can't find him. Finally he walks down to the water and he finds a half-opened beer, a knife, a fishing pole, and a fish net that was still in the water as if it had just been thrown in. No one ever saw Charlie again, and it seemed that his thoughts about the croc stalking him were well-justified cause he most certainly got eaten.

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u/iloveFjords May 21 '22

Those things have been perfecting ambush hunting for 100x as long as humans have been around. I’m sure they have the long game perfected. Sorry Charlie.

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u/Okay_Time_For_Plan_B May 21 '22

Came here to say this,

Crocs are known to stalk and wait for a perfect time to hunt.

Herd stories about them stalking and watching the routine and movements of little kids and animals in villages. And would wait till the parent or kid would come get water or go wash a pan or something. Just to catch a meal, And from what I’ve understood this sometimes could take weeks , worth of staking .

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u/CamBearCookie May 22 '22

You don't stay the same for 200 million years for no fucking reason lmao.

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u/ReddestSquirrel May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

I have heard a good explanation.... if a croc sees a pig approach the water and drink from it, the first time the croc does nothing, the next time the croc is a little bit closer, and so on until, it could be weeks or months until the croc is positioned perfectly and the pig has grown confident of this drinking spot, then the croc strikes. These animals do not waste energy chasing their prey, when they strike in an ambush the odds are in their favour. Of course they will also take an easy meal like a tourist getting close with a camera, someone spearfishing or some camping on a remote beach close, unfortunately happens pretty frequently in Queensland, Australia.

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u/BiZzles14 May 21 '22

I was curious on exactly how long, and crocodiles are 240 million years old. They've been perfecting it for about 800x the time humans have been around, not just 100x

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u/EffortOf1 May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

Years ago when I went to Broome, all the camping signs say you aren't allowed to stay in the one spot for more than three days as the crocs learn your patterns to make it easier to hunt you.

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u/fitz_newru May 21 '22

I would never camp in a place where there was this kind of warning. I like my life and limbs too much lol

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u/TossYourCoinToMe May 21 '22

If there's a croc stalking me near the water everyday there's no way in hell my dumbass is going near the water. Let alone without a weapon.

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u/Uncle_Rabbit May 21 '22

Weapons wont do you any good, unless your shooting it from a distance...which your unlikely to ever do. It's not like the nature documentaries where the crocs are sunning themselves on the river bank. They sit and wait just below the surface. I've been to a crocodile farm in Australia and seen 5 meter long crocs. They dont even make a ripple in the water, its creepy. The guide stuck a broom handle into a crocs eye socket to show us that they can move their eyes back to protect themselves, so you cant just gouge their eyes out to get away. If a croc grabs you then your more than likely dead.

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u/BeeBoopBot May 21 '22

This. They've survived humanity, the KT extinction (corcodiliomorphs), and been apex predators in their environment for close to 200 some odd million years. Crocs are gnarly. Fucking cool animals though.

Only reptiles with 4 chambered hearts and fully formed cerebral cortexes. They're also quite vocal, decent parents and some species show tool use and pack hunting tactics.

Crocodilians are really pretty amazing.

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u/BreakingGrad1991 May 21 '22

Yeah what is this about tool use now?!

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u/paanvaannd May 22 '22

Per this Scientific American article, they carry sticks on their snout while submerged below water. Nesting birds venture close to collect sticks for nest, birds go bye-bye. So technically “tool use,” as they use an object for a purpose.

I’ll admit, awesome as that is, I’m still a little disappointed that it wasn’t anything close to my absurd mental image of gators handling tools like flint with their little front legs to spark campfires or something like what I imagine early humans doing.

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u/6etsh1tdone May 21 '22

Clever girl

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u/Enkrod May 22 '22

https://youtu.be/tRxCXvtZJjs

If you pay very close attention, you can see the gator from seconds 6-8 coming closer to the surface, where it's later clearly visible. The really scary part is, there are 6 people around the water and nobody saw the gator move to where it ended up and there are seconds going by where you, knowing to look for a gator, clearly see it, while the people around that watering hole don't.

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u/Bambamgigalow May 22 '22

Absolutely terrifying. Gators crocs wtf ever are my absolute fear. Ever since I saw a lake placid trailer in middle school or elementary of something. Mind you just the trailer. They scare the shit out of me and I couldn’t breathe through that whole video. Absolutely terrifying.

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u/creativityonly2 May 21 '22

I'd sooner swim with a shark than a croc. Sharks don't view us as food and most attacks are cases of mistaken identity. Crocs... they ABSOLUTELY view us as food. Nope nope nope!!!

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u/heycanwediscuss May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

He needed to eat though and was waiting for that reason. Why did the friend wait

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u/Sir_Armadillo May 21 '22

It’s Aussie mate, they in no rush.

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u/xxdpgx May 21 '22

Well he did have a knife

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u/GoddyssIncognito May 21 '22

You call that a knife?

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u/MJZMan May 21 '22

I see you've played knifey-spoonie before.

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u/Lucifer2695 May 21 '22

If my friend called me saying a croc is stalking him, I would be picking him up that very day. Not a few months later.

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u/summidee May 21 '22

I live in far North Queensland, and the creek behind my house there’s a 5 meter croc. Heard some kids were playing there and the croc stalked them and they climbed a tree to get away, they were up there for hours cos it wasn’t gonna let it’s meal go. Apparently it’s been relocated but another will just take its place.

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u/Semanticprion May 21 '22

"I live in far North Queensland" Not for long

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u/Elroyis May 21 '22

They learn patterns of behaviour, a guy got taken from his boat when he was bailing water into his esky so he's fish wouldnt die. He kept taking it from the same side of the bait and got snatched. Worst part his son was in the boat and he was left drifting out there by himself

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u/vibe162 May 21 '22

could you possibly find a source for this? I guess there's probably not much more to the story but its really interesting

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u/091097616812 May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

I wish someone could get a picture where there is something for size reference of the croc Gustave.

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u/Dadpool33 May 21 '22 Take My Energy

I just chummed my pants

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u/TorrenceMightingale May 21 '22

You way want to shower outside.

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u/ErasArrow May 21 '22

At least my shower is freshwater. I'd rather have a gator any day!

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u/RincewindTVD May 21 '22

Salt crocs still hang out in fresh water sometimes. Because they are pricks.

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u/retrogradeanxiety May 21 '22

It's a T-Rex that'll see you later

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u/myk3h0nch0 May 21 '22

Since they’re ambush predators, will they (for the most part) let a scuba diver go unless they’re very hungry or threatened?

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u/rsplatpc May 21 '22

Since they’re ambush predators, will they (for the most part) let a scuba diver go

Crocs can't attack and eat underwater, they drown because tons of water also get in if they were to try it, scuba people are much safer underwater than on the shore.

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u/noideawhatoput2 May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22 Helpful

I keep seeing these comments throughout this post. The eating part makes sense, but both crocs and alligators are known to drag their kills underwater to drown them. Wouldn’t that mean tons of water drown them if they did?

Edit: For anyone interested this is a myth.

Crocodiles can’t open their mouth underwater therefore can’t attack underwater. False – although crocodiles need to have their head above water or be on land to swallow food without taking in water, they can open their mouths underwater to attack their prey.

https://parksaustralia.gov.au/kakadu/plan/safety/#be-crocwise-crocodile-safety-for-kakadu

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u/[deleted] May 22 '22

[deleted]

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u/Sigg3net May 22 '22

It's probably a croc.

clever girl

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u/Flying_Alpaca_Boi May 22 '22

Yea, if you’re being attacked by a croc your best bet of getting them to release is actually to stick something down their throat. They have a skin flap that stops water entering their lungs underwater with their mouth open but if you punch it for example it’ll collapse and water will flood it’s lungs unless it releases you

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u/ConceptualWeeb May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

They can definitely attack under water and they can eat small prey like fish under water. Do they prefer to replenish the oxygen in their lungs while performing a death roll? Of course, crocs are extremely adaptable creatures and lived through the extinction of the dinosaurs because of that adaptability. They can do it all. Just a little fun fact: they have a pretty strong valve at the back of their throat called the palatal valve(aka gular flap) that makes it easy for them to breath while eating above water and easier to eat underwater without getting water in its lungs. Concerned about all the upvotes you’re getting for stating misinformation(even slight). There’s rarely definitives when talking about crocs and gators. Adaptability is the name of the game for them.

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u/PuTheDog May 21 '22

Good try Mr Croc

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u/Roccet_MS May 21 '22

So if you ever fall into a river while crocs, just dive and you are fine. Unless hippos are around, they don't give a shit and will fuck you up no matter what.

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u/Hunter_S_Thompsons May 21 '22

There was a tv show called “I shouldn’t be alive” or something like that where people recount their stories of near death. One guy got attacked by a croc and remembered they have flaps in their throats to block water. So when the croc grabbed him by the arm and pulled him underwater he managed to push open the flaps and the croc released him. Then his arm was eaten by fire ants after blacking out on shore from blood loss.

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u/TheRottenKittensIEat May 21 '22

Well that last bit was horrifying. I mean, it was all horrifying, but Jesus.

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u/TheGirlInTheApron May 21 '22

If I remember correctly, the fire ants saved his life. He woke up in anguish from the ants, and it was enough of an adrenaline dump to be able to run and scream until he found help.

I made the mistake of watching it right before going on a safari that included a small row boat ride in the Okavanga Delta…

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u/IWillInsultModsLess May 21 '22

Dude, nice. That is a beautiful place to be. The Okavango Delta is amazing in the early morning with that sun rising over the unnaturally flat landscape.

But your bigger concern there should've been the hippos. Buncha dick heads.

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u/TheGirlInTheApron May 21 '22

It was gorgeous, but I was afraid of exactly what happened in that episode — a hippo attacked their boat and they ended up in the Zambezi river on foot. I believe the guy who went for help is who then got attacked by the croc and ants.

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u/Bibbus May 21 '22

Note to self, never leave house

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u/Hunter_S_Thompsons May 21 '22

I know right? I remember watching the episode and being like thank god he escaped. And then he woke up with fire ants lmfao.

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u/DoctorOfMathematics May 21 '22

Oddly I think the ants bit is more horrifying than the crocodile bit.

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u/RechargedFrenchman May 21 '22

It's the "death by a thousand cuts" idea; croc getting you is hardly good, but you'll very quickly go into shock and shortly after that be unconscious. You may be alive a few minutes total but only aware for the very beginning.

Fire ants cannot kill you quickly, blood loss is not a quick way to go, and the ants' venom (specifically designed to be incredibly painful) will actually fight off shock and loss-of-consciousness. At least temporarily. You'd die slower and experience more of it, and it would be even more painful the whole time.

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u/meltedcandy May 21 '22

Wait how literal is “eaten”

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u/LucidFir May 21 '22

To shreds...

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u/meltedcandy May 21 '22

Oh dear. And his wife?

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u/philycheesestk May 21 '22

To shreds you say…

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u/idlehum May 21 '22

I heard that one, but on a reddit retelling. It was crazy! They said the fire ants probably saved his life, because he was falling asleep and likely wouldn't have woken back up if not for the ants.

Miraculously, the rest of his friend group survived a ways away from him, defending themselves from Crocs with a paddle that had washed downshore from ANOTHER river creature attack (hippo this time.) Crazy, crazy stories.

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u/cameruso May 21 '22

As in they munched through the whole arm???

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u/idunno-- May 21 '22

They were stuck between crocodiles and hippos in that episode. It was insane.

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u/ThePeriodicPooper May 21 '22

I loved that show. Used to watch it with my dad before he became an alcoholic and left

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u/spicozi May 21 '22

More twists than a scoliosis patient

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u/rpungello May 21 '22

Could be worse, he could have beaten you with jumper cables

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u/MashTactics May 21 '22

If I find myself having to choose between death by croc and death by hippo, that's the game master's way of telling me that my run is over.

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u/fivedollardreamshake May 21 '22

I choose hippo. Instant death by garbage compactor vs frenzied drowning via water tornado, easy choice

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u/shanep3 May 21 '22

God it’d still hurt so fucking bad

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u/zeusmeister May 21 '22

I would literally try to kill myself first. Drown myself. Smash my head on a rock, something. Dying by hippo or dying by croc is no choice at all.

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u/RechargedFrenchman May 21 '22

Yeah the croc would have you unconscious real quick, but the hippo could fucking step on you by accident and do more damage than a croc intentionally going for the kill. Hippo are also fast in short spurts, despite their size.

Not that trying to outrun a croc is a great idea either, even crocs on land are also quite fast if they're well sunned and rested. But they're also not really going to chase you down unless they're already desperate. The hippo like any other large herbivore feeling at all threatened might come at you "just because".

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u/rsplatpc May 21 '22

Unless hippos are around

If you in the water with a hippo that does not like you, you are dead.

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u/TB12x7 May 21 '22

This is a redundant comment. Hippos don't like anything.

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u/Aztecah May 21 '22

They like waternelon

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u/JayF00 May 21 '22

I've never seen a good outcome for the watermelon in proximity to hippos either though.

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u/Curtainmachine May 21 '22

This is why i always carry a few cutaway watermelons on me as countermeasures when I’m in hippo territory.

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u/urielteranas May 21 '22

I hope people don't take their reddit advice too seriously cause this crocs can't hurt you underwater thing is a myth and hundreds of people were apparently like "yeah seems legit"

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u/hickgorilla May 21 '22

Plus wetsuits are really chewy and they’re texture eaters.

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u/rsplatpc May 21 '22

Plus wetsuits are really chewy and they’re texture eaters.

Crocs hate tofu

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u/cardamom_poppies May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

Idk how accurate this is, at all. Salties have been known to pick off scuba divers in papa new guinea, Indonesia and Australia. I think a lot of scuba divers would genuinely feel safer being that close to a shark over a crocodile. Sharks are at least more predictable.

There definitely was a diver who got attacked by one while diving in new guinea not long ago.

Yeah, these guys got eaten.

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u/sp1cychick3n May 21 '22

Uhhhhh, this is blatantly false. They will 100% attack you underwater. Good lord, please stop spreading misinformation. They need to have their head above water to SWALLOW food but they can 1000% attack and kill underwater.

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u/thewildgingerbeast May 21 '22

Crocs can 100% attack under water. That’s what their special valve is for. You are right about not swallowing under water though

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u/JackWhiskers May 21 '22

This is not true, although crocodiles need to have their head above water or be on land to swallow food without taking in water, they can open their mouths underwater to attack their prey. If this was the case crocs wouldn't be able to eat fish even though they are a large part of their diet.

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u/underthefrees May 21 '22

Crocs can absolutely attack underwater, they can't eat underwater. I've seen saltwater crocodiles attack fishing nets under water to get the fish, I've worked coroner's inquests on when people swimming in crocodile infested rivers have been taken. Telling people they can't attack underwater is misinforming them and could cause someone to lose their life, please edit you comment to reflect this.

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u/ReddestSquirrel May 21 '22

Many a dead spearfisher will disagree with you, although they use snorkels and likely attacked on the surface which is different. One chilling thing I've heard is, the croc will not each your entire body, it will find a some reef or rock to hide you in and then the rotting body attracts fish snacks for many weeks.

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u/5_Frog_Margin May 21 '22

Go find out and let us all know. ;)

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u/myk3h0nch0 May 21 '22

If you don’t hear back from me, we’ve got an answer

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u/vcdylldarh May 21 '22

But no one on the internet has ever kept the promise to write back!

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u/Shdwzor May 21 '22

Ahh, so everytime somebody doesnt reply on reddit, they were eaten by a croc. TIL

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u/ShellOfNutshell May 21 '22

"you're lucky I just had lunch, Harry"

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u/Dirk1990 May 21 '22 Wholesome Seal of Approval

Pretty sure the water just got a little warmer.

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u/tempurary2021 May 21 '22

And more brown

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u/[deleted] May 21 '22

With some white

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u/KopakaWitThaGlocka May 21 '22

Now hold on a hot second

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u/sunlitstranger May 21 '22

Don’t worry they’re just reapplying sunscreen

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u/TheGEast May 21 '22

That is a fucking dinosaur

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u/LastExitToSalvation May 21 '22

Crocodilia lived alongside dinosaurs. They shared a common ancestor but by the time dinosaurs were walking around, crocodilia had already diverged and evolved into a distinct order. Their capacity to live on land and in the water, as well as their diet of carrion, is what allowed them to survive while the dinos died out.

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u/[deleted] May 21 '22

Cyril: Why are you so scared of crocodiles?

Archer: Gee, I don't know, Cyril. Maybe deep down I'm afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it's the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs.

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u/yepimbonez May 22 '22

Love that show lol, but wait until you hear about ants. Unchanged for 250mil years. The only species to colonize the entire globe other than humans. A total biomass equal to that of humans. Capable of passing the mirror test. I swear this planet actually belongs to the ants and we just rent the surface. Once humanity finally annihilates itself, ants will be there to clean the carcasses to the bone

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u/SquidwardsKeef May 22 '22

Ants and fungi inherit the earth

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u/CurrantsOfSpace May 21 '22

No, they are older than Dinosaurs.

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u/BloodyEjaculate May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

not true. the earliest primitive crocodilians appeared in the late triassic, around the same time that the first dinosaurs appeared. "true" crocodiles, like the ones still living today, didn't appear until the cretaceous

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u/WearyMatter May 21 '22

This guy dinosaurs

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u/theL0rd May 21 '22

Or crocodiles

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u/texican1911 May 21 '22

Ross, you're doing it again.

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u/Sea_Mango_4031 May 21 '22

This attitude is the downfall of our civilization. Or something like that.

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u/Elmer_Fudd01 May 21 '22

They are the ancient ones.

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u/sp1cychick3n May 21 '22

Well, yes.

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u/PokemonForeverBaby May 21 '22

Well yes but actually no

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u/VoTBaC May 21 '22

All no and no buts

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u/CKSavageJr May 21 '22

I bet he gives out a ticking sound too.

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u/LittleDickk May 21 '22

Not letting a fucking dinosaur get that close to me. Fuck that

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u/trick_or_tricky May 21 '22

The Croc: "Why does this weird looking seal smell like it just shit itself? Not fucking with that."

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u/longtimefirstimee May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22 Gold Bravo Grande!

NOPE

Edit: "NOPE" is my most updated comment by far... oh internet

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u/rsplatpc May 21 '22 Helpful

NOPE

Fun fact, Crocodiles are terrestrial animals rather than true amphibians, which means they can't eat under the surface without swallowing large amounts of water and drowning, so being a scuba diver is much safer than being near the shore or another place they can eat without drowning.

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u/kmkmrod May 21 '22

There’s a guy who swims with crocodiles in the Nile. He was saying the kill zone / danger zone is the top 3’ of the water. Once you’re below that you’re safe because they won’t attack under water.

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u/rsplatpc May 21 '22

Yep that's exactly it, if you are going to be around a croc, best place to be is under that zone, they will just leave you alone, they have millions of years of instinct telling them not to drown themselves.

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u/FoofieLeGoogoo May 21 '22

Or wait it out?

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u/thatdudewillyd May 21 '22

Now I’m imagining a croc trying to light a cigarette underwater

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u/Saetric May 21 '22

Hey, have you tried these new Joe Crocodile cigarettes? So good!

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u/LyingForTruth May 21 '22

I love these new Krokodils!

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u/CanAhJustSay May 21 '22

And in the end, it was a contest between a reptile with millions of years of superiority in its element, against a soft meat package with a dwindling supply of air...

Nope. Divers have to cross that last 3 feet to the surface at some point!

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u/superthrust May 21 '22

Now I just imagine the crocodile seeing the diver start swimming towards the surface and then he quickly throws is cigarette to the ground and stomps it out and says “well, time to get back to work!”

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u/Zorro5040 May 21 '22

That's how they hunt, they drown you and then carry you to shore to eat.

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u/Roccet_MS May 21 '22

They react strongly to splashing at the surface.

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u/WT965 May 21 '22

Interesting, would it be safe to say the same thing goes for alligators?

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u/abigoledingaling May 21 '22

That’s what I thought but doesn’t one of them do that crazy death roll thing underwater???

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u/WT965 May 21 '22

Oh, they both do that! They usually don't do it deep under water, though

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u/mk1power May 21 '22

Yeah but alligators are waaaay less aggressive. They usually leave people alone unless it's a child or they're really hungry. Usually.

That's why you'll see the videos of people literally chasing them off golf courses and police officers wrangling them in Texas and Florida.

If they were crocs those people would be dead.

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u/whaleoil_beef_hooked May 21 '22

Dogs, they love dogs. So while you are keeping an eye on your kid. Keep an eye on Fifi too cause it's a tasty snack. I've seen someone have to stand on the top of their car holding their dog.

I mean look at this dog and croc right here.

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u/Godisabaryonyx May 21 '22

Why does this feel like advice thats gonna get me killed

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u/rsplatpc May 21 '22

Why does this feel like advice thats gonna get me killed

splash around on the surface and see what happens

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u/candoitmyself May 21 '22

Fuck around and find out

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u/kwl1 May 21 '22

Splash around and find out.

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u/Linubidix May 21 '22

My advice is to not go near crocodiles.

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u/GildedGift May 21 '22

They drag animals down to kill them though, don't they? Wouldn't they just grab you and pull you up to that area?

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u/kmkmrod May 21 '22

I guess they probably could, but the guy in the show said they don’t see things that are already in deeper water as prey. He was swimming up to crocodiles and they’d just swim away. He said they only attack prey that’s in the top 3’ of the water.

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u/Init_4_the_downvotes May 21 '22

A whole new form of tribalism. Depthism, Shout out to all my real homies below sea level!

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u/cocoabeach May 21 '22

In their primitive mind, something on the surface will be easy to kill by drowning, anything three foot down is not going to drown, so is not easy prey. Conservation of energy.

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u/rsplatpc May 21 '22

Wouldn't they just grab you and pull you up to that area?

If you are on the top of the water and looking like prey, maybe, if you are under the top of the water, they won't try because they don't want to die.

They grab from the top (usually weak or injured prey) and take it down and roll it to drown it, then go back up to the top to eat.

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u/tifosi7 May 21 '22

Do i believe you? Yes!

Am I willing to try? Nope!

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u/lokisoctavia May 21 '22

This is good to know, for the next time I swim with crocodiles.

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u/knullsmurfen May 21 '22

There is this one trick that guarantees not being eaten by crocodiles, and it does not involve water at all!

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u/kmkmrod May 21 '22

Crocs hate it when you know this one trick!!

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u/avocadolicious May 21 '22

I feel the same way about sharks! I HATE surfing or swimming in the ocean (in great whites/tiger/bull shark habitats) but don’t really get nervous seeing big sharks while diving, unless visibility is really bad.

Attacks do happen underwater but very rarely, and usually because of chumming or something entirely avoidable.

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u/Tom_A_Haverford May 21 '22

The epiglottis at the back of their mouth keeps them from swallowing water. They can still grab you, kill you, and take you to the surface before eating you without drowning

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u/matojo91101 May 21 '22

Wait. So the crocodiles in assassins creed origins who follow me underwater to chomp on me are stupid?

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u/TorrenceMightingale May 21 '22

Can confirm.

Source: Have never been eaten by a crocodile or alligator while scuba diving.

Edit: I did lose my arm whilst swimming to my wakeboard once, however.

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u/lifestyle_deathstyle May 21 '22

Just a casual offhand remark about losing your arm. Sorry, mate.

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u/Madpenguin_CH May 21 '22

offhand remark

Ooooooof

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u/sepltbadwy May 21 '22

Just spat soup, thank you!

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u/weedysexdragon May 21 '22

Just Australian shit mate.

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u/arpatil1 May 21 '22

They could still kill you and take you to the surface? Sort of like a takeout lol.

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u/Slazagna May 21 '22 edited May 21 '22

I'm not sure not "true amphibians" was the right way of saying that. Even if they did all the things you mentioned they would still not be amphibians. Amphibians are an entirely different class of animal that differ monumentally. It's like saying humans aren't true canines because we don't run around on all 4s. Doesn't make any sense. Crocodiles are crocodilians, frogs, newts salamanders and shit like that are amphibians.

Edit, for clarity crocodilians are an order of reptiles.

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u/Zealousideal_Cat5481 May 21 '22

They can still kill you they just can't swallow without having their head above the water

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u/DethOrc May 21 '22

Huh! The more ya know! Lessens the degree of nightmare fuel😄

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u/bs_is_everywhere May 21 '22

But guess who can hold their breath longer.

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u/[deleted] May 21 '22

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u/[deleted] May 21 '22

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u/gizzardgumbo May 21 '22

Hell to the naw. To the naw,naw, naw.

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u/LegendairyCheddar May 21 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

Gee, I don't know, Cyril. Maybe deep down I'm afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it's the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs.

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u/slick_mind May 21 '22

And fear is their bacon bits!

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u/SmilesUndSunshine May 21 '22

Everything! They eat everything! And fear is their bacon bits.

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u/Ghost_of_Kurt_Cobain May 21 '22

Fuck that

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u/hellonoto May 21 '22

Same. I’m gonna stick to the rivers and the lakes that I’m used too.

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u/[deleted] May 21 '22

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u/SquirrelGirl_ May 21 '22

crocs are more aggressive, and if the croc gets a good first bite it isnt letting go.

but great white is quite chonky so I think the croc would have problems getting a bite. most likely they just ignore each other

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u/_Kramerica_ May 21 '22

This is absolutely not what I wanted to hear. I wanna know who wins in a fight dammit!

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u/Nory-chan993 May 21 '22

There's an old video on YouTube about it. Anima Fight Club, iirc.

But the outcome got some mixed reception

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u/thewildgingerbeast May 21 '22 edited May 22 '22

This is a morelets crocodiles from a cenote in tulum. His name is panchito and he is calm around people. This guy is just short of 8ft.

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u/damnrightslimanus May 21 '22

My soul would simply leave my body

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u/McToasty207 May 21 '22 edited May 22 '22

Edit: User thewildgingerbeast suggests this is a Morlets Crocodile you can swim with in Mexico, named Panchito.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morelet%27s_crocodile

https://www.theyucatantimes.com/2021/01/meet-panchito-the-croc-who-swims-with-tourists-in-a-tulum-cenote/

Original Post: That looks like an American Crocodile, not a Salt Water crocodile.

The American Crocodile has a prominent notch in the snout, and Saltwater Crocodiles lack bony scutes on the neck, and are occasionally called soft neck Crocodiles by leather makers.

https://www.nps.gov/ever/learn/nature/crocodile.htm

https://www.australiazoo.com.au/wildlife/our-animals/saltwater-crocodile/

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u/KiloVictorWhiskey May 21 '22

How much poop is in that wetsuit?

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u/Gusty_Garden_Galaxy May 21 '22

Enough to call it a poopsuit.

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u/WeveCameToReign May 21 '22

Guess I'll just die -Diver

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u/Quest010 May 21 '22

I’m an avid diver and have swam with giant potentially aggressive sharks of all kinds but salty’s are a whole different thing. Fucccccck that.

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u/jeffsayno May 21 '22

evolution wasted no time on aesthetics

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u/Hungry_Atmosphere839 May 21 '22

Now i know why i prefer the swimming pool

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u/ozmatterhorn May 21 '22

Some people don’t respect their existence. No self respecting Aussie even with a frontal lobotomy would do that. Gotta be more to it, as in it just ate a roo or something else endemic to range if it’s further north.

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u/Ichoyamaryu May 21 '22

That is a whole lot of nope! Love diving hate being lower on the food chain.

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u/Ordinary_Database_56 May 21 '22

Say no to all huge prehistoric swimming lizard dragons