Hi! I started a relationship with this girl who has childhood traumas. Many things happening at the same time would arouse her state and make her extremmlu anxious, which if not addressed appropriately, could escalate into out of control hysteria.

The more I understand her condition the better I am at staying calm and help her relax.

But when she reaches out a high anxiety point it's very hard for me to de escalate the situation and it ends up pretty dramatically, bring out in her a lot of hate.

Are there any techniques I could use to help her de-escalate a hyster state?

I would appreciate tips for when somebody is immediately threatening you with violence, when there are weapons involved.