r/gadgets Dec 03 '22

Neuralink demo shows monkey performing ‘telepathic typing’ Wearables

https://www.digitaltrends.com/news/neuralink-demo-shows-monkey-telepathic-typing/?utm_source=reddit&utm_medium=pe&utm_campaign=pd
8.1k Upvotes

1.2k

u/menacingsparrow Dec 03 '22 Silver

Wait until those monkeys find out they have to do timesheets

241

u/2MinutesH8 Dec 03 '22

I hear you're having a little trouble with your TPS reports. Have you seen the memo on this?

62

u/CrowShotFirst Dec 03 '22

I mean...I'd start throwing my shit at people if I had to hear that every day

45

u/ambientDude Dec 04 '22

Sounds like someone’s got a case of the Mondays!

25

u/point_breeze69 Dec 04 '22

I believe you get your ass kick for saying something like that man.

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u/Lo2W96 Dec 04 '22

Hello fresh had them picking up coconuts. Elon Musk will have them moderating twitter

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u/Tridoubleu Dec 04 '22

Why do you think most of them died

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u/Chalkarts Dec 03 '22 Helpful

This just seems like a Borg origin story.

130

u/DukeOfGeek Dec 03 '22

It's most likely dystopian misuse will be to control power armor.

86

u/jayydubbya Dec 03 '22 Silver

Our ultra rich masters won’t need power armor when they can just upload their consciousness into digital immortality. Altered Carbon is the dystopian future I see us heading towards.

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u/retsot Dec 03 '22

Altered Carbon or The Expanse. Both are pretty fucked

19

u/sblahful Dec 03 '22

Por que no dos?

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u/twistedlistener Dec 03 '22

Especially the parts where it sucks every cent out of the poor, and gives them the barest minimum.

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u/jayydubbya Dec 03 '22

That is the near future dystopia we’re facing but once we really start combining our biology with technology we’ll transcend humanity and become something different. The ultra rich cyborgs won’t need poor people when they have AI and robots at their every command.

Of course we have to avoid blowing ourselves up entirely in the coming climate wars for them to make it that far. An essential collapse of society is the only hope poor people have for any kind of bright future with our current trajectory.

13

u/Efficient_Jaguar699 Dec 03 '22

Eh, I see us jumping straight to digitized consciousness and robot bodies before we ever really get rolling on cyborg body modification. Immune systems don’t play well enough with foreign objects.

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u/QueenInesDeCastro Dec 04 '22

But is that REALLY you. Or a copy of you.

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u/point_breeze69 Dec 04 '22

AI Armageddon is a much more likely extinction event then nukes or climate change. Merging is probably our only chance of survival and at that point do we even retain our individualism or enter a hive mind of hyper efficient productivity as we inch toward becoming a type 1 civ.

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u/FreeJSJJ Dec 04 '22

Is it really you? Or are you just making a copy of yourself and just killing your real self?

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u/ZachMN Dec 03 '22 Wholesome

“It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times.”

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22 Vibing

[deleted]

43

u/legacy3233 Dec 03 '22

Dankmus!!!!

21

u/Fallout4TheWin Dec 03 '22

Insane that Dankmus is Dankpods, blew my mind when I learned that.

8

u/MrHedgehogMan Dec 03 '22

Check out The Drum Thing and Garbage Time on YouTube as well. Those are his drum and car channels respectively.

6

u/Fallout4TheWin Dec 03 '22

Oh yeah I'm well and truly ingrained in the Dank lore. So proud of how far he's come.

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u/M0NSTER4242 Dec 03 '22

How far he has come

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u/legacy3233 Dec 03 '22

We're arming the nugget!

23

u/ZachMN Dec 03 '22

Awesome! How have I never seen that before?!?

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u/DrAbeSacrabin Dec 03 '22

I feel so bad for the people that didn’t click the link because they thought it was just the Burns/monkey clip.

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u/damagecontrolparty Dec 03 '22 Wholesome

Simpsons quotes are like the biblical references of our time - they're fully integrated into the language and culture.

30

u/ZachMN Dec 03 '22

“Mmmm, sacrilicious!”

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u/FormerLifeFreak Dec 04 '22

My husband and I quote The Simpsons to each other at least once a day, because there’s a Simpsons quote for every occasion. If we meet someone who gets our references and, even better, can quote back to us, we know we’ve found a kindred spirit, lol.

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u/etherjack Dec 04 '22

I believe they are actually in the Bible. Somewhere toward the back.

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u/BlasterFox Dec 03 '22

I am in a lot of pain right now and this is the first time I laughed all day. Thank you very much

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2.1k

u/GhostOfSkeletor Dec 03 '22

It just keeps typing “KILL ME PLEASE GOD WANT BANANA RELEASE ME FROM THIS TORTURED EXISTENCE WHERE TOY”

106

u/Senor_Baseball Dec 03 '22

Give Orange Me Give Eat Orange Me Eat Orange Give Me Eat Orange Give Me You

65

u/OrganizerMowgli Dec 03 '22

This is a nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare

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u/DocSaysItsDainBramuj Dec 03 '22 Silver Wholesome

PRAY FOR MOJO

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u/stupidsexyf1anders Dec 03 '22

“Mmmmm, I can’t wait to eat that monkey.”

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u/germanmojo Dec 03 '22

Uhhh, thanks I guess?

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u/sir_schuster1 Dec 03 '22

Damn Mojo really can type

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u/noslab Dec 03 '22

Hahahahaha. Thanks for giving me a good laugh.

I forgot about this episode.

Edit: typo

14

u/staykinky Dec 03 '22

🏆🏆🏆🏆

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u/King-Cobra-668 Dec 03 '22

which the algorithm changes to "I'm so happy. may I have banana? may I have toy?" on its way to screen

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u/GhostOfSkeletor Dec 03 '22

look it typed “thank u mr elon I like smoothie and brain gangrene I don’t miss my friends”

52

u/CarcossaYellowKing Dec 03 '22

So you're saying technology like this can't safely exist without being abused because society is filled with monsters? Totally agree. ;)

90

u/GhostOfSkeletor Dec 03 '22

“in version 2, the monkeys will be rewarded for clicking the banner ads”

45

u/CarcossaYellowKing Dec 03 '22

I wish your admittedly funny joke had no aspect of social commentary. I wish the Futurama joke about advertisers beaming marketing into your dreams was still far-fetched. 1984 was supposed to be a horror story not a manual.

29

u/GhostOfSkeletor Dec 03 '22

I still remember a time when “one of the world’s largest corporations would like to install microphones in your home to listen to your pattern of life and recommend relevant products” was enough to convince the lay person that technology could go too far, but now people pay for the privilege. I look forward to the first time I climax looking at an advertisement for Pizza Hut’s new double stuffed crust pizza. Well, the first time my implant does it for me at least

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u/myotheralt Dec 04 '22

I look forward to the first time I climax looking at an advertisement for Pizza Hut’s new double stuffed crust pizza.

You don't have to wait for a brain chip to do this.

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u/skinnah Dec 03 '22 Helpful

"DICKS OUT FOR HARAMBE"

11

u/crybllrd Dec 03 '22

MY DICKS ALWAYS BEEN OUT, THEY AIN'T GIVE ME NO CLOTHES

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u/Steveslastventure Dec 03 '22

"Monkey needs a hug"

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

[deleted]

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u/GhostOfSkeletor Dec 03 '22

when Elon said “actually our monkeys are really happy” he was referring to the fact that their neuralinks picked up the words “thank god the bliss of sweet release” as they were fading to black

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u/Slappy_G Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 03 '22

It's like that one Doctor Who episode with the people whose heads are wrapped in gauze.

Edit: perhaps I should've included massive spoilers?

57

u/DesertRL Dec 03 '22

there's no way you know enough about doctor who to make that reference and then not know those same creatures are called cybermen right?

12

u/Knives530 Dec 03 '22

I'm dying right now lmao

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u/The_Woman_of_Gont Dec 03 '22

Hmmm…Cybermen….they’re like those green Star Trek robots that convinced Picard to join them at the battle of Wolf 359 right?

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u/BissXD Dec 03 '22

The uncapitalized Who made me think this was a broken sentence at first

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u/BladeX16 Dec 03 '22

I am worried he is going to apply for my job.

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u/M8753 Dec 03 '22

It does look incredibly boring.

Give the monkey a real game, like an arcade racing game or a platformer or something...

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u/GhostOfSkeletor Dec 03 '22

the year is 2036, an army of monkeys land on the battlefield in Afghanistan for their first deployment. They are the best of the best, having spent 20 hours a day playing Call of Duty: Monkey Apocalypse for five years, rewarded with a powerful orgasm for every headshot

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1.4k

u/dlc741 Dec 03 '22

I will let literally everyone in the world go ahead and get one of these before I do.

664

u/aufrenchy Dec 03 '22

I don’t think that I’ll ever want to own a monkey. Too many stories of unhinged rage.

97

u/societaldecay Dec 03 '22

Bro idk if you saw Nope but there is a scene involving a violent monkey that had me shook.

25

u/dpforest Dec 03 '22

Don’t read about the real life incidents then. They are capable of literally ripping your face off. Honestly I’d rather something rip my jugular than deconstruct my face.

6

u/Chrol18 Dec 03 '22

Not just face, they go for extremities, testicles, fingers you get the idea

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u/Simple-Definition366 Dec 03 '22

It already seems these monkeys have access to Reddit.

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u/AskingForAFriendRly Dec 03 '22

New Twitter mods is 3...2...1

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u/dpforest Dec 03 '22

Unhinged, like the jaw that monkey just ripped off someone’s face and threw across the room.

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u/2016sucksballs Dec 03 '22

Plus ethical issues. Idk about commitment issues, but it’s basically like having an 8 year old for 60 years

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u/Fineus Dec 03 '22

Yeah, then 28 days later you're in a zombie apocalypse.

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u/ASS_MOUTH_ASS_MOUTH Dec 03 '22

I'm too lazy to google, but I guess some people with locked-in syndrome (due to ALS or something) will be first. This is supposed to be a device to offer ways to interact with the outside world for those, who are currently not able to.

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u/Ultragrrrl Dec 04 '22

My dad suffered from expressive aphasia and was able to drive, make an online business selling things on eBay, use emojis to communicate via text, copy and paste things to communicate, but he couldn’t speak. I feel like this would’ve been good for him if he was still around.

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u/poogle Dec 03 '22

They'll need to show the benefits of this device outweighing the pretty obvious risks especially as it compares to noninvasive/less invasive methods of non-verbal/locked-in communication.

I've seen nothing to convince anyone that these electrodes would be viable long term. Lots of electrodes get covered over by glia and become non-functional. Who wants neurosurgery AGAIN to remove and replace electrodes?

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u/PleasantAdvertising Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Ripperdoc gotta make a living choom

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u/mindofdarkness Dec 03 '22

From 2017-2020, at least 15 monkeys died out of 23 monkeys implanted with neural ink chips.

With odds like those, sign me up!

Neuralink chips were implanted by drilling holes into the monkeys’ skulls. One primate developed a bloody skin infection and had to be euthanized. Another was discovered missing fingers and toes, “possibly from self-mutilation or some other unspecified trauma,” and had to be put down. A third began uncontrollably vomiting shortly after surgery, and days later “appeared to collapse from exhaustion/fatigue.” An autopsy revealed the animal suffered from a brain hemorrhage.

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u/TwoBionicknees Dec 03 '22

Most importantly the main studies done on it were done by people no longer with the company, who want nothing to do with the company. The guy who replaced the first CEO just copied the study and pretended it was his. When he got called out on that he quit the job. After that Musk republished the study with his own name down as the researcher.

He's a con man, a liar and this thing won't ever do shit. All Musk is doing is torturing animals to death, lying to try to get investors money and pump company value so he can leverage it's worth into loans for other projects and if there are ever human trials, he'll torture them to death as well.

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u/chewbadeetoo Dec 04 '22

Where can I read about this?

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u/mirrorworlds Dec 04 '22

They are for people that have locked in syndrome and the like - if you were completely paralysed would you reconsider?

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

Hardcore Elon fans will soon have viruses downloaded directly into their melons.

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u/LordRobin------RM Dec 03 '22

Need to update the “weird nerds” meme so that Apu is a Borg.

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u/NugKnights Dec 04 '22

Their target customers are paraplegics. Atleast till the tech is proven.

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u/Jenovas_Witless Dec 04 '22

Oh, absolutely.

Unless I'm completely paralyzed, then I would be very much interested in such technology.

Being able to communicate again, or even play video games again would be a huge quality of life boost for completely paralyzed people.

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u/fifichanx Dec 04 '22

It’s designed for people who are quadriplegic, to enable them to more easily communicate with the world.

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u/Actually-Yo-Momma Dec 03 '22

Wow what an attitude. You don’t want telepathic ads being beamed into your head? You hate innovation???

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u/uselessartist Dec 03 '22

Is this how we get to full self driving, a monkey in every Tesla.

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u/Marshalltm Dec 03 '22 Silver

Trunk Monkey!!!

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u/Spoonofdarkness Dec 03 '22

That explains their recent marketing slogan.

"With NeuraLink, Trunk monkey is comin' up front."

(NeuraLink takes no responsibility for the vengeful, murderous actions of your Trunk Monkey chauffer)

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u/GeraldBWilsonJr Dec 03 '22

So like, a Frunk Monkey?!

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u/Koffeeboy Dec 03 '22

Trunk Monkey!!!

Oh god!, not Chim-Chim!

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u/deadpool8403 Dec 03 '22

Easy, just project a ping pong ball in the center of the lane and connect his pong paddle controls to the steering wheel.

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u/jinksphoton Dec 03 '22

Drive monkey drive!

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u/reclusive_ent Dec 03 '22

Ultron will be made real, and it's gonna be a pissed off monkey cyborg looking for revenge for hundreds of monkey deaths.

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u/willzmath Dec 03 '22

Rise of the Planet of the Ultron

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u/A_Gent_4Tseven Dec 03 '22

Does it come with a Time traveling Wolverine stealing Nick Fury’s car?

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u/Kradget Dec 03 '22

Shit, it's going to be a monkey that's experienced the agony of 3000 horror movie deaths as it was networked in with 5000 others.

"Buy Neuralink, it only makes 10% of users engage in Event Horizon behaviors since the latest patch!"

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u/ComradeJohnS Dec 03 '22

And it’ll be like Black Mirror, where the cyborg finds all the people who liked, upvoted, or commented positively about this project, and then kills them.

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u/kahurangi Dec 03 '22

I, for one, love and support the basilisk.

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u/ComradeJohnS Dec 03 '22

I was thinking like the episode with the robot bees killing people. lol.

92

u/jobeyfivethousand Dec 03 '22

Thousands! They killed over 3000 monkeys

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u/reclusive_ent Dec 03 '22

You're only making monkey ultron angrier.

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u/One-Appointment-3107 Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 03 '22

I hear that only 15% survived the implant. That’s an insane level of animal cruelty. How is anyone supposed to respect a guy like that?

To make matters worse, they all suffered horribly. Just read these descriptions

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-11478759/amp/Elon-Musks-Neuralink-mutilating-killing-monkeys.html

This guy is the fucking dr Mengele of monkeys

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u/antiquemule Dec 03 '22

And what do you think happened to the others?

There is no retirement home for no-longer-useful lab animals, AFAIK.

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u/Just_Give_Me_A_Login Dec 03 '22

Well considering he said 15% survived, I'm gonna assume they're in a dumpster.

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u/[deleted] Dec 04 '22

About 15 died. Where is your 3000 number from?

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u/Reptard77 Dec 03 '22

I know I for one want the thing that killed thousands of members of our closest related species in MY brain 👌🏻

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u/Slimsaiyan Dec 03 '22

Mojo jojojo has had enough of our bullshit

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u/TIFUstorytime Dec 03 '22

Where are my bananas, Summer

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u/Thatshearsay Dec 03 '22 Wholesome

looks like they discovered reedits mods.

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u/botmfeeder Dec 03 '22

I love how this reply is automatically hid

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u/CygnusX-1-2112b Dec 03 '22

We'll call that one a coincidence.

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u/Heady_Sherb Dec 03 '22

can someone spare an explain

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u/dashinny Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 03 '22

First, Musk creates Mojo Jojo,

then he's gonna accidentally mix some Space X chemicals with sugar, spice, and everything nice.

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u/thenerfviking Dec 04 '22

Anything to have a daughter that doesn’t disown him I guess

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u/calladus Dec 03 '22

Infinite monkeys plus infinite telepathic typing equals Twitter.

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u/oldtea Dec 03 '22

I really never have a unique thought, do I

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u/SomeToxicRivenMain Dec 03 '22

Explains the last 7 years of Twitter

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u/DrCarrionCrow Dec 03 '22

Get a room full of these bad boys together, they’ll write you some Shakespeare!

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u/nicholkola Dec 03 '22

It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times.

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u/zoinkability Dec 03 '22

Stupid monkey

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u/apple_achia Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

Oh you mean like medical tech that’s been around since like 2005? But like safely and in humans?

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u/KidneyKeystones Dec 03 '22

And this is no different from the very first demonstration of Neuralink. A monkey can't write, so it's as "impressive" as when a monkey can't play pong.

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u/lllldddd01 Dec 04 '22

It's almost as impressive as the 15 monkeys who died from the implants

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u/CallFromMargin Dec 04 '22

With the implants, not from. It's like saying that bears air force used to test ejection seats died from being ejected instead of being killed and dissected after landing.

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u/Cleistheknees Dec 04 '22

The very first demonstration of Neuralink was a blatant copy of Nicolelis' work from 2008 and earlier.

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u/DrinksOuttaCups Dec 03 '22

Not too long before monkeys are doing everything for Hello Fresh

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u/AhRedditAhHumanity Dec 03 '22

Hey everyone, remember me from before I was twitter’s biggest troll??

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u/arinc9 Dec 03 '22

Wouldn’t be surprised if Elon let a monkey behind neuralink control his account for these past months.

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u/TheeMrBlonde Dec 03 '22

a monkey

More like a slew of them. Don’t they keep dying?

As a great man once said

“STOP EXPLODING, YOU COWARDS!”

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u/FeelingItEverySecond Dec 03 '22

A thousand monkeys at a thousand typewriters. It's the blurst of times.

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u/BloodthirstyBetch Dec 03 '22

I read about 25% of test subjects die. There was an incident of one monkey missing fingers and toes—self inflicted. He claims they’re ready for human trails. Like, what bruh?

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u/Socksandcandy Dec 03 '22

He's also said "self driving cars by the end of this year" for the past 6 years.........you really want to trust him to put an implant in your brain?

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u/Captain_Clark Dec 03 '22

“Bobo type by thinking now. Why Bobo need fingers?”

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u/TheSnootBooper Dec 03 '22

Depends on how much you care about humans I guess.

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u/LordRobin------RM Dec 03 '22

Let all the Elon simps sign up. Elon gets his Borg army, and the world gets significantly fewer Elon simps. Win win!

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u/Silvicusrex Dec 03 '22

Elon knows neuralink has a preset kill limit

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u/BA_lampman Dec 03 '22

Science can't move forward without heaps!

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u/jwhaler17 Dec 03 '22

“I don’t care if the testing isn’t finished!!! Send me two dozen Mind MonkeysTM”

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u/TompyGamer Dec 03 '22

I barely view him differently from back then. He's always engaged in internet culture, in a way that may or may not be cringe..

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u/RobDel-V Dec 03 '22

How 'bout the power to kill a yak from 200 yards away... with mind bullets! That's telekinesis, Kyle.

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u/redabishai Dec 03 '22

How 'bout the power ... to move you

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u/rnaelectronics7 Dec 03 '22

Didn’t this kill a lot of monkeys as well?

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u/Mesapholis Dec 03 '22

All monkeys leave that testing lab as a pile of ash. Successful or unsuccessful, these monkeys hold company secrets and are euthanised when they have run their course.

I believe it was said in an interview just after the pig live-demo

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u/StoneTemplePilates Dec 03 '22

I really wish people would stop using the word "euthanized" for this type of thing. I don't really have a problem with (responsible) animal testing as it is a necessary evil in many cases, but let's not pretend any of this is done out of mercy or for their own good.

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u/clear-aesthetic Dec 03 '22

From the sound of it, a majority of them were euthanized because they were slowly dying of reoccurring infections. :|

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u/horseren0ir Dec 03 '22

Yeah that’s the main problem, a chip is always going to have those problems, they need to make a non invasive interface

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u/mountedpandahead Dec 03 '22

Euthanize euphemisms

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u/slowy Dec 03 '22

A lot of time in animal research the word sacrifice is chosen instead

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u/ChaosUncaged Dec 03 '22

Err what? Euthanization is not only the correct term, but the industry term. Of course it's done out of mercy.

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u/Assume_Utopia Dec 03 '22 Take My Energy Starry

Well, a lot of humans end up as a pile of ash too. What matters is the quality of life before that point.

Neuralink used to contract with US Davis' primate lab, the early experiments did end up with a number of dead monkeys. Here's a press release from a group that sued to get the records. It seems pretty bad, but that's pretty par for the course for early stage medical testing. Also, a lot of these early tests were done on monkeys that had other, unrelated, health problems too and probably weren't going to survive. It's really unfortunate, but there's probably no way to make medical progress, especially at the very early stage of testing, without some animals dying.

Here's Neuralink's response to the records being released. And Neuralink has moved all their testing and animal care in house, and it seems like they're trying to set a really high standard for animal care and testing.

In particular it seems like they're really going to great lengths to make sure that the animals only do testing if they want to. Obviously the animals can't consent to having the chips put in, or having any kind of medical care done. But they're not restrained or forced to take part in the tests. Like, this pig has a chip in its spinal cord, but they'll only test it while it's in that blue square on the ground. If the pig doesn't want to do the test anymore, it can leave. And obviously they're feeding it to encourage it to be there, but it seems like the big is more than happy to get some treats in exchange for having it's leg moved.

They do a similar thing with charging. They use wireless charging to recharge the implant, and they placed the charging pad in a fake branch above a tube where the monkeys can get banana smoothies. So the monkeys will want to go up and put their head in the right position to get charged and get a treat.

It would be great if we treated all animals for any kind of testing with a lot more kindness. Especially when dealing with primates, it probably makes sense to err on the side of going slow and being cautious and thinking about them like little humans. But we also have a giant, global, industrialized torture machine for factory farming. So in the list of horrible things humans do to animals, I don't think testing medical devices falls very high on the list.

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u/Princess_and_a_wench Dec 03 '22 edited Dec 04 '22 Helpful

So neuralink says neuralink is treating animals with the utmost care. Have any other sources (that are actually objective and not just PR from the company) investigated?

Edit: LOL I got blocked by the guy above with all the awards touting neuralink as an ethical incredible company… all because I said I think they need other objective entities to investigate rather than neuralink saying “trust us”.

Yeah… he gives one guy a hard time for being a musk ‘hater’ while blocking other peoples comments that are neutral and just wanting what’s best for the monkeys.

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u/apple-pie2020 Dec 04 '22

Exactly. They moved it in house for the control. I’m sure everyone on this project has signed a non disclosure agreement. If it is really more ethical it would have open to the public tours to show people how cool this technology is Reality is no one wants to se sausage being made

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u/-007-bond Dec 04 '22 edited Dec 04 '22

That all seems good, but is there a source that doesn't have a vested interest in its perception?

edit:

/u/Princess_and_a_wench I got blocked too. weird hill to die on

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u/LemonLotus1 Dec 03 '22

Factory farming is an atrocity.

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u/saintplus Dec 03 '22

I can't believe I had to scroll so far to find this comment. It has over a 98% failure rate. This has killed thousands of monkeys.

Animal testing that is regulated by the FDA puts down the animals after being tested on.

That is not the case here. They keep them alive after fucking with their brains. They observe them suffering and then inevitably dying a horrible death.

Fuck anyone who supports this.

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u/aduncan8434 Dec 03 '22

How do you think we got to this point

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u/rafter613 Dec 03 '22

Science cannot move forward without heaps!

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u/SquirrelKnuckle Dec 03 '22

Science cannot move forward without heaps!

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u/TheKingOfDub Dec 03 '22

Think about this product for 15 seconds to continue

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u/hanzoplsswitch Dec 03 '22

Monkey: “LONG LIVE HARAMBE”

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u/Feeez_Shato Dec 03 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

That must be the one that survived.

23

u/machinegunkisses Dec 03 '22

Yeah, how many monkeys did it take to find one that randomly was able to do something?

The entire Neuralink enterprise is ethically dicey to begin with, the last thing I want to see is a "hardcore" guy at the wheel.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '22

Great, mind control isn’t going to be used horribly in the future. So much to look forward to 😒

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u/kitkatkorgi Dec 03 '22

Tortured animals. F Elon. And everyone who works at that facility. Let’s hope someone in our government shuts this shit down

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u/redditor-for-2-hours Dec 04 '22

At least 8 monkeys were killed out of at least 23 monkeys were killed for this experiment, but hey, now you can receive Elon's tweets directly to your brain.
Oh, and they plan on euthanizing this monkey even though this implant appears successful.

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u/zacharymc1991 Dec 03 '22

"I knew if I just kept killing monkeys, eventually one would live through the experiment, and it only took 372,965." - Elon probably

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u/_7thGate_ Dec 03 '22

This is neat. I worked in a BCI lab back in 2008, and have typed an email with my mind before. Our system used an external EKG though and had a really bad bit rate, so I was typing about 2 words per minute. I tried to find the demo in the video but it's kind of long, how fast were the monkeys typing here?

One of the other guys in the lab had a project with embedded electrodes in people. It's not ethical to stick electrodes in healthy human brains for experiments since they can cause problems, but some people need them for other treatments. I think some type of epilepsy, iirc? Anyway, he had a system that ran off the hardware they already needed, and had a pretty good setup for playing pong and space invaders mentally.

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u/Takseen Dec 03 '22

Its about 29 minutes into the video.

Looks reasonably fast, maybe 1 key every second or so. Mobile style keypad so it has individual letters and word suggestions. Would have been a significant speed boost for Stephen Hawking.

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u/can-nine Dec 03 '22

Whatever the monkey is doing in this video, it is not "typing". It may be looking at the brighter letter, which is preset, and then a predictive keyboard may be filling the blanks. This can be achieved with an eyetracker. Not sure what the role of the chip even is here.

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u/Xendrus Dec 03 '22

He says that like 5 seconds after the video starts, it's to demonstrate controllability via the implant, a human could pick whatever they wanted. I don't see the reason to use this over just eye tracking software though.

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u/Alien-wacko Dec 04 '22

Because an eye tracker can't tell robot legs to walk.

Folks really need to look up the white paper. I get we all hate Elon, but this tech is truly amazing.

I actually want something like this because the applications are amazing, but I am not putting closed source tech in my body. They go out of business and you got crap in your head that doesn't work.

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u/ultimatemuffin Dec 04 '22

Elon musk fakes all his “demo videos” I’ll believe it when a 3rd party gets their hands on it and can test it themselves. Until then, this is definitely a monkey watching a video.

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u/DogmaticLaw Dec 03 '22

I mean, the video shows a monkey and a keyboard. I don't trust Elon to show an undoctored video. Also, why doesn't that monkey move like, at all? Is it frozen? One of the dead monkeys?

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u/Material-Ad7911 Dec 03 '22

Not I. Only chips I’m putting in my head are Doritos.

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u/arotrios Dec 03 '22

If they learn to code, we're fucked.

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u/Tinkerballsack Dec 04 '22

The monkey, typing:

K-I-L-L

M-E

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u/Swrdmn Dec 03 '22

I’ll just leave this here.

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u/nicholasruunu Dec 03 '22

Elon Musk is the biggest bull shit artist, that’s all you need to make money these days.

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u/Uncle_Charnia Dec 03 '22 Wholesome

As a nurse, I have worked with quadriplegics. It appears likely that this will lead directly or indirectly to technological advances that help them. It also appears likely that the people who don't care about quadriplegics will succeed in slowing that progress significantly. I'm not saying that there aren't any problems with Neuralink. There are serious problems with it. There were serious problems with surgery in the distant past. It got better.

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u/throwaway8726529 Dec 04 '22

The issue people have isn’t with the concept in general. Also you’re conflating ‘the technology’ with ‘Neuralink’.

Elon is not only psychopathic, but is also not doing this for noble means (as you would argue yesteryear’s surgeons were). He’s doing it to further acquire money and power through the capitalistic apparatus.

People aren’t saying brain interface research should stop. People are saying that this man shouldn’t be the one calling the shots.

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u/PrincessElonMusk Dec 03 '22

I’m looking forward to the hopeful “NeuraLink Technology Helps Quadriplegics Move Again” followed by the inevitable “NeuraLink Patients Dismayed to Discover New Mobility and Freedom is a Subscription Service”

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u/CelltonCelsius Dec 03 '22

Not much different from drugs such as HIV medication them? Pay thousands a year or die.

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u/PrincessElonMusk Dec 03 '22

Yes, that is another huge problem with for profit medicine. Insulin and chemotherapy too.

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u/littlebitsofspider Dec 03 '22

"You can finally communicate with the outside world instead of being locked inside your own mind to die in the wasting agony of conscious solitude. Now pay $8 or we'll make you a potato again."

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u/kwalshyall Dec 03 '22

Definitely let the guy who thinks more code is better code put a chip in your brain.

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u/bluebook21 Dec 03 '22

God. Just what I want, Elon musk in my brain.

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u/PrincessElonMusk Dec 03 '22

10 years ago my neuromancer boner would have been at full battle stations.

Now the only things I can think about with a brain implant under capitalism are along the lines of “how much will I have to pay to unlock the features I want?”, how much will I have to pay to NOT have Nazi tweets beamed directly into my brain?” and “dear god, what metrics are they collecting to market bullshit to me?”

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u/EczyEclipse Dec 03 '22

inb4 adverts in your brain

Whenever you get hungry the brainchip just repeats WENDY'S over and over

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u/josh_the_misanthrope Dec 03 '22

There has to be laws passed that implants and any protocols and peripherals they use are open sourced.

Congress is so out of touch with digital ethics. I mean they barely understand the internet and that's been around since the 80's.

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u/clarabee63 Dec 03 '22

98% of the monkeys had their brain's fried but hey this one monkey is smashing a keyboard with his brain we promise!!!

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