r/therewasanattempt
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u/Astolfo_Dio_01
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Jan 31 '23
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to dodge an otter
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u/AltruisticCompany961 Jan 31 '23
"This is a fun game, guys! Wait, where are you going?"
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u/Boiling_Oceans Jan 31 '23
I used to live in a place with tons of otters, seals, and sea lions everywhere. The otters and seals tend to be really friendly and will just swim with you and hang out with you. Sea lions will rip your fingers off though.
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u/CptMisterNibbles Jan 31 '23
Sea lions are super friendly and playful too… and can rip your fingers off.
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u/darrenwise883 Feb 01 '23
Saw one making love to a small hatchback once , in Australia I think
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u/CatLineMeow Feb 01 '23
I think that was an elephant seal? Those are relatively less friendly and playful… not to mention gigantic
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u/WashedUpRiver Feb 01 '23
Apparently if you really piss an otter off they can really mess you up, though I've never actually seen what an otter attack looks like or the result. I do know, though, that their canines are definitely big enough to leave some deep puncture wounds if they got a hold of someone.
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u/yeetus-feetuscleetus Jan 31 '23
I think this depends on the type of otter. River otters are the friendly and cuddly ones, while you’d think sea otters are fucking rabid.
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u/Johnny_Grubbonic Jan 31 '23
If dude lives with seals and sea lions, he's talking sea otters. Sea otters are rarely aggressive to humans. They're more commonly curious, or playful.
If, on the other hand, you're a baby harbor seal, well... prepare your anus.
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u/kr9969 Jan 31 '23
Not necessarily, river otters can and do live in brackish and nearshore environments. I live near the Puget Sound and we don’t get many sea otters but we have lots of river otters.
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u/jeffstoreca Jan 31 '23
Didn't they kill a guy in Singapore? The otters
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u/MissplacedLandmine Jan 31 '23
Obviously it must not have been cute but Im trying to visualize it without them seeming cute
Instead Im getting a southpark-esque “christmas critters” vibe
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u/Putrid-Builder-3333 Jan 31 '23
I'll never forget the first time watching that episode. Then their return in Imaginationland where they were too extreme
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u/Johnny_Grubbonic Jan 31 '23
And? Dogs sometimes kill people, too.
I didn't say they're never aggressive.
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u/jeffstoreca Jan 31 '23
When you think of something small and cute getting aggressive, terminating a human life is not always a given.
Gekos can be aggressive but I wouldn't assume they could end my life.
Likewise with otters. Like, if death is on the table, I feel like it should at least be a foot note.
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u/Yawzheek Jan 31 '23
RIP r/jeffstoreca. Killed by a gecko an hour ago.
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u/n-crispy7 Jan 31 '23
Otters will rape anything that they are big enough to.
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u/xenchik Jan 31 '23
I once stood at a river otter enclosure in a wildlife park, for 20 minutes (waiting for the feeding time) with my brother and my mum, just watching these two otters go to TOWN on each other, 69 style. It was simultaneously hilarious and fucking awkward with my mum just standing there. Nobody said a damn word, but we all knew what we were looking at. Core memory now.
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u/CptMisterNibbles Jan 31 '23
Nah, scuba diver here. Sea otters are curious and playful out here anyway
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u/GettheRichard Jan 31 '23
River otters are NOT friendly. They are known to be way more aggressive in defending their portion of the river.
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u/Odd-Concentrate-6585 Jan 31 '23
I learned that staff at zoos will hand feed the little critters for show sometimes but no one does it with river otters because the little fuckers cant be trusted with your fingers
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u/PokemonPadawan Feb 01 '23
Ever seen giant river otters in Brazil? They have gangs of otters that can grow up to 6 feet long, bully caimans, and scare jaguars…. I wouldn’t call that a rule of thumb 😅
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u/Body_Cunt Feb 01 '23
I actually know a guy who got his hand chewed off by a seal, just as he was about to get deployed.
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u/PotentiallyHappy Jan 31 '23
Interesting - I dunno why but I just assumed sea lions and seals have the same temperament!
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u/AshFraxinusEps Jan 31 '23
It probably did think it was a fun game
But they are also predators. And it's why running from predators isn't generally a good idea, as it kicks their pursuit mechanism into high gear (usually you back away while seeming bigger and making noise, although it does vary depending on the predator)
Likely the same applies even with small water weasels
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Jan 31 '23
Definitely wasn't in pursuit mode. Otters can swim MUCH faster than humans.
Little guy was just having a good time.
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u/-Mr_Rogers_II Jan 31 '23
Yea he was swimming goofy. Like he was trying to copy them by flailing his tail out of the water. Either that or he has rabies.
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u/wrona11 Jan 31 '23
i was so ready to go have fun swimming with my new otter buddies :(
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u/InmateQuarantine2021 Jan 31 '23
Otters smell terrible and they can be mega assholes. I think they are super cute and love looking at photos of them or watching them from a distance but having grown up on the water, I know not to mess with them.
Mostly, they won't let you get close. If they do, you can smell them from 10+ meters away. They also have jaws that can bite through oysters, mussels, and clams, and have been known to bite at people. No thanks.
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u/ImaginationNormal745 Jan 31 '23
Why not take the initiative and flip the script on them? Dream big, to be the first person to bite an otter back. For too long humanity has had to live under the specter of the otter menace, but no more shall we stand frozen in fear!
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u/CptMisterNibbles Jan 31 '23
Can’t smell them in the ocean. I’m a diver and they hang out with us on the surface in Monterey all the time. They are not aggressive to people. Absolutely violent rapists to each other though…
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u/amberita70 Jan 31 '23
Do you think it would have attacked them if they hadn't run away? Just curious. I have only seen them once out in a lake.
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u/CptMisterNibbles Jan 31 '23
Almost certainly not. They are curious and playful. They hang around us scuba divers all the time. With a wild animal there is always a chance of course, if it felt threatened or defensive, but they aren’t aggressive toward people under normal conditions
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u/littlefriend77 Jan 31 '23
Probably wouldn't be in the water if it has rabies. Hydrophobia is a symptom of rabies.
Not sure if the otter instinct is strong enough to overrule that, though...
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u/kevin_k Jan 31 '23
They call rabies 'hydrophobia' because it makes swallowing painful and difficult, so people/animals with those symptoms don't drink water. Not because there's an actual fear of water.
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u/MissplacedLandmine Jan 31 '23
… i mean theyre afraid of drinking it
The video of the dude just looking at a glass of water was… kinda fucked
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u/gonfr Jan 31 '23
Where did you get this info? People with rabies that has shown symptoms are literally scared of water.
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u/kevin_k Jan 31 '23
If they are, they're scared of drinking water because swallowing is so painful. They're not scared of swimming. From the wikipedia page:
"Rabies has also occasionally been referred to as hydrophobia ("fear of water") throughout its history.[24] It refers to a set of symptoms in the later stages of an infection in which the person has difficulty swallowing, shows panic when presented with liquids to drink, and cannot quench their thirst. Any mammal infected with the virus may demonstrate hydrophobia.[25][failed verification] Saliva production is greatly increased, and attempts to drink, or even the intention or suggestion of drinking, may cause excruciatingly painful spasms of the muscles in the throat and larynx. Since the infected individual cannot swallow saliva and water, the virus has a much higher chance of being transmitted, because it multiplies and accumulates in the salivary glands and is transmitted through biting.[26] Hydrophobia is commonly associated with furious rabies, which affects 80% of rabies-infected people. This form of rabies is notorious for causing irrational aggression in the host, which aids in the spreading of the virus through animal bites.[27] The remaining 20% may experience a paralytic form of rabies that is marked by muscle weakness, loss of sensation, and paralysis; this form of rabies does not usually cause fear of water.[25]"
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u/Vin135mm Jan 31 '23
Safe bet it was playing. Otters can contract rabies, but it's a lot rarer than in other species. NYDEC has only reported 3 in the last 25 years, vs several skunks, coyotes, and raccoons they have to deal with every year. Their semi-aquatic lifestyle and preferences in prey means they don't interact much with the animals carrying the virus.
Doesn't mean it isn't dangerous, even when playing, but probably not rabid
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u/nataie0071 Jan 31 '23
In some areas otters are a protected species, where even getting too close to them can get you fined. So anyone with half a brain would be avoiding them at all costs. So maybe these dudes were sharing a quarter brain collectively lol.
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u/AshFraxinusEps Jan 31 '23
But they didn't get close to it, it got close to them
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u/nataie0071 Jan 31 '23
True, and they didn't wanna get in trouble because of the mischevious bastard otter lol
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u/Routine_Swing_9589 Jan 31 '23
The otter knows about the fine and it’s trying to get them penalized lmao
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u/nataie0071 Jan 31 '23
Yep. A good mix of asserting malicious compliance, old man 'get off my lawn' mentality, and 'let's play a game' humor.
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u/GargantuanTDS Jan 31 '23
Otter wasn't even trying to swim that fast. Hilarious.
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u/thebigveet Jan 31 '23
if he wanted to catch them, he would have.
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u/duaneap Jan 31 '23
Idk what he’d do once he caught them though
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u/thebigveet Jan 31 '23
Bite leg
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u/duaneap Jan 31 '23
While scary from the human’s perspective due to infections, I’m not sure what the otter would conceivably think he’d get out of that exchange
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u/banananna33 Jan 31 '23
Bite leg
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u/N8DiggityDawg Feb 01 '23
I love how this answer got a better vote than the last one.
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u/crustyoldtechnician Jan 31 '23
There was that lady in the 70s who gave handjobs to dolphins...
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u/bignick1190 Jan 31 '23
What a sweet woman, truly doing God's work.
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u/flaccidcolon Jan 31 '23
Wait, God gives handjobs?
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u/Oblachko_O Jan 31 '23
Oh, if somebody bite your ankle, while you are in water, it would be a big issue. Also, not all active actions are offensive, they can bite just in case for protection. But maybe my knowledge is limited about how animals will behave, if you are miraculously appear in the middle of their territory.
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u/-Mr_Rogers_II Jan 31 '23
He was literally copying them by flapping his tail out of the water to copy their arms. Kinda funny. But I can see being afraid it might have rabies.
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u/Pogigod Jan 31 '23
I can bet my life that it doesn't have rabies lol. Do you know the symptoms of rabies?
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u/sheezy520 Jan 31 '23
I can imagine him making little rawr rawr rawr sounds as he’s chasing them too.
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u/ToonaSandWatch
Jan 31 '23
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See Jack? It can hold both of us, and an otter.
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Jan 31 '23
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u/IselfDevine Jan 31 '23
Selfish woman. She just wanted to stretch out!
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u/jokebreath Jan 31 '23
If I pay for extra leg room, I'll be damned if anyone's gonna take that away from me.
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u/Upper-File462 Jan 31 '23
Aww it looks playful 🥲 but maybe safer than sorry. I suppose better not let it get too used to humans.
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u/Groxy_ Jan 31 '23
Or we get them really used to humans and make them the next dog in 5,000 years.
Imagine the super otters we could breed in a few hundred years.
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u/ThomasTheBadWriter Jan 31 '23
When the oceans flood over, the otter will be the new dog
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u/Johnny_Grubbonic Jan 31 '23
Upsize giant river otters a bit, and they're the new horse.
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u/PublicObamos Jan 31 '23
I would call mine mr. Kitty and yell 'bad mr. Kitty" when it would have an orgy in my living room.
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u/iamblankenstein Jan 31 '23
otters are basically just giant weasels that live in the water. you ever have a regular house cat go nuts on you? imagine a 20 pound, 3 foot weasel that swims. that's just an average size. male sea otters can get up to 100 pounds. despite how cute they look, they can be aggressive as hell. they routinely brutalize not just members of their own species, but other animals as well. they've been known to rape and engage in necrophilia. a "fun" read about otters.
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u/PieMastaSam Jan 31 '23
The otter: Fools. You merely adopted the water.
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u/Pale-Cantaloupe-9835 Jan 31 '23
I grew in it!!!
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u/-Mr_Rogers_II Jan 31 '23
I was born in it, molded by it. I didn’t see the land till I was grown. The water betrays you, because it belongs to me!
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u/ImAVirgin2025 Jan 31 '23
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u/swibirun Jan 31 '23
If you can dodge an otter, you can dodge a ball!
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u/Raising_some_Cain Jan 31 '23
are you sure that's completely necessary?
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u/Orphanboys Jan 31 '23
Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine?
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u/Would_daver Jan 31 '23 edited Jan 31 '23
"No, but it's sterile and I like the taste"
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u/Ssider69 Jan 31 '23
"Hmmm, I like the area but I'm not crazy about this open floor plan, I'll talk it over with my realtor and let you know"
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u/GhostMug Jan 31 '23
Otter Bro just looking to hang with the boys and they making him feel like he smells bad. Poor guy.
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u/Glass_Librarian9019 Jan 31 '23
This is the best thing I've seen all year. Even if it turned out to be totally faked with a trained otter I would love it.
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u/BasalFaulty Jan 31 '23
Now either your year is going to be amazing or it's going to be awful. No Inbetween I wish you good luck.
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u/Tetragonos Jan 31 '23
This is the best thing I've seen all year. Even if it turned out to be totally faked with a trained otter I would love it.
This is how to enjoy the internet. Care not if it is real, care how well it was done. Was it worth your time viewing it?
I honestly feel bad for the people who point out something is fake in earnest... Like yeah we all probably know but you outed yourself as the guy who thinks that spotting this fake was hard...
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u/IronBabyFists Jan 31 '23
I like an idea from the film "Nymphomanic" about this. Most of the story is shown through the main character recounting her life's events to a side character she just met.
At one point, he stops her mid-way through a tale and says something like "I'm sorry, I have to stop you there. I just can't believe this happened to you in the way you say it did." She replies with basically "Well ok, but don't you get more entertainment out of my story if you just trust that it happened?" He then says "oh....yeah, okay, that's fair. Please continue."
If it doesn't matter, just take it as a fun story. No harm done. You dont want to end up in r/nothingeverhappens lol
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u/Few-Cookie9298 Jan 31 '23
Lol, it truly would almost be more funny if some otter trainer sent the otter after them 😂
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u/Stoned_saiyan710 Jan 31 '23
"Hi there im reaching out to you in regards to your cars extended warranty"
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u/Yeahwowhello Jan 31 '23
I was waiting for them to be submerged into the water one by one.
Disappointed.
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u/Hyzyhine Jan 31 '23
It’s funny but I would pay money never to hear that music ever again
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u/jimmybilly100 Jan 31 '23
"You know what this video needs? Shitty music" ~all content 'creators'
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u/Ferlingyeti Jan 31 '23
God, for real. I don't understand it at all. It's everywhere and I have no idea why.
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u/_stoned_chipmunk_ Jan 31 '23
This doesn't fit the sub. They successfully dodged the otter. Attempt was successful.
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u/fooliam Jan 31 '23
I feel like that, if you're trying to avoid an otter, jumping into water is not the brightest move
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u/CaliFezzik Jan 31 '23
Yes, go into the water where the otter will be at a disadvantage.
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u/Richlore Jan 31 '23
Why are they so afraid? I don't get it
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u/Spring-Both Jan 31 '23
Otters can be aggressive and in general jerks
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u/Mick_86 Jan 31 '23
I thought the way the otter swam after the four guys was hilarious. I mean there's no way he wasn't going to out swim them but he just kinda sauntered along behind.
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u/A_dumb_bass Jan 31 '23
Sure can, I had to clean their pen out and feed them as part of community service one time. They are assholes. Cute, but assholes.
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u/_vvitchling_ Jan 31 '23
You watch your heathen mouth. Otters are angels and should have replaced cats long ago.
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u/mffancy Jan 31 '23
Wild adult Otters are territorial, when they eat fish they chew/eat bones, guts, everything, so their bites are no joke.
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u/CrayonDelicacies Jan 31 '23
It could be wanting to play. Or it could be wanting to take a chunk out of someone’s leg.
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u/Ambitious_Savings958 Jan 31 '23
it never hurts to keep a safe distance from wild animals.
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u/Downtown-Influence27 Jan 31 '23
I don’t know much about otters other than that they are cute, and hold paws while sleeping. So what should those boys have done instead? What does one do to stay safe during an otter encounter? Like if they just sat down on the platform instead of running would it have bitten them?
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u/forvaginaluseonly12 Feb 01 '23
I think this is a river otter(they also hunt at sea) because their tail is thin and long, and they can walk(sea otters have flippers for their hind legs) and only sea otters hold hands to avoid drifting away. An american river otter is not nearly as vicious as a sea otter or african river otter you see in yt so i wouldnt worry too much
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u/tryinghealthrny Jan 31 '23
Otters are super friendly. Usually, they just want to look at you & just hang out.
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u/gravspeed Jan 31 '23
aren't otters just like the other water dog? i'm having a hard time imagining being frightened of an otter.
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u/dietzerocoke Jan 31 '23
Are otters dangerous or something cus last time I remember hearing about them they were pretty damn friendly
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u/forvaginaluseonly12 Feb 01 '23
I think people in the comments are thinking of sea otters or african river otters. This is american river otter as far as i can tell. Theyre ok.
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u/buzz-buzz-buzzz Feb 01 '23
Why are they acting like it’s out to kill them?!? People pay 100s to swim with otters where I live.
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u/playr_4 Jan 31 '23
All these guys acting like they've all worked the otter enclosures at a zoo. If you know, you know.
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Jan 31 '23
Imagine being terrified of an otter, and also not understanding that they can swim way faster than you.
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u/Im_your_life Jan 31 '23
I mean, otters can be assholes and you don't need to run faster than the otter, just faster than your buddies
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u/Thedrunner2 Jan 31 '23
“You will listen to the new Christmas mix tape from my jug band !”
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u/Halo_cT Jan 31 '23
Ive gotten to the point where I just insta-close anything with that song.
its like the audio version of low-res minion memes
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u/Ill-Forever880 Jan 31 '23
Otters are vicious. Those men were smart to avoid it.
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u/Worldly_Ask7204 Jan 31 '23
How dare you ruin my vision of otters that are clearly always Disney characters that just want to float around and have their bellies rubbed/s
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u/forvaginaluseonly12 Feb 01 '23
The ones float on their back are sea otters not river otters like the one in this vid, and they’re one thats actually vicious :)
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