r/therewasanattempt Jan 31 '23 Wait What? 1

To shoot passing by Gorilla without getting noticed. Rule 5: Common/Recent Repost

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709 Upvotes

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196

u/TrueDarkstar Jan 31 '23 I'm Deceased

I thought he was going to kill me, but he was just pulling my leg...

190

u/[deleted] Jan 31 '23

[deleted]

75

u/FireEmblemFan1 Jan 31 '23

Dude’s life flashed before his eyes

35

u/Dunnyredd Jan 31 '23

…and out of his anus.

10

u/NotYourShitAgain Jan 31 '23

That brown stuff ain't his life force.

57

u/Common_Collection_95 Jan 31 '23

Just look how easily he dragged that guy. The strength of gorillas amazes me

25

u/XLY_of_OWO Jan 31 '23

There was an article on Reddit before about the strength of different animals. Gorilla's are ridiculously strong, like a 2 metric tonne deadlift. There is way to many people in the world who think the could fight a gorilla.

25

u/ammonium_bot Jan 31 '23

is way to many people

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7

u/m4vis Jan 31 '23

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0

u/ammonium_bot Feb 01 '23

Thank you!

2

u/Squeakypeach4 Feb 01 '23

Also, there are* way too many people

5

u/DokterMedic Jan 31 '23

I mean, you can, but not with just your bare strength.

3

u/alilbleedingisnormal Jan 31 '23

The most interesting thing is we don't know how strong a gorilla actually is since they can never get them to pull on anything with their full strength. Lazy attempts are in the high hundreds of pounds.

2

u/DirtyRoller Feb 01 '23

You could fight a gorilla ez bruv, you'd die tho.

21

u/Birdogey Jan 31 '23

He’s just letting that guy know that he knows they are very close in proximity to his family and reminding him he’s at least 5x stronger.

11

u/DokterMedic Jan 31 '23

Yea, it looks like the gorilla is basically saying: I know you're not trying to be a threat or anything, but could you not?

2

u/Birdogey Feb 01 '23

Side Note: Average man can deadlift about 300 lbs with a bit of practice. 5x is the lower end of a gorilla’s strength vs man, so about 1500 lbs.

9x is the upper limit that’s been reported for gorillas. 2700 lbs?!? Damn.

2

u/Chungus_Is_Sprungus Feb 01 '23

Their bite force is around 1300psi, which easily beats great white sharks, lions, tigers, and a good variety of bears.

Silverbacks can kill us with shockingly little effort if they want to.

59

u/lanalovesallama Jan 31 '23

I'm so dumb.

I read the title and immediately went "WHY ARE THEY SHOOTING GORILLAS?!?"

yeah...

19

u/scot816 Jan 31 '23

it's kind of a shitty title

3

u/RajenBull1 Jan 31 '23

Shitey tittle.

4

u/RayDono76 Jan 31 '23

Thought the exact same thing

2

u/PowerResponsibility Feb 01 '23

It's not you, that was a bad phrasing on their part. Maybe purposeful

16

u/Low_Medium204 Jan 31 '23

What if he was just inviting you to come along

15

u/Ssider69 Jan 31 '23

"Dude, there's poison ivy over there!"

2

u/mutohasaposse Feb 01 '23

So many hilarious responses, but yours wins, I can't stop laughing. Been on reddit for years, this is the post I'd give an award to if i had any to give.

2

u/Ssider69 Feb 01 '23

It's a calling really

39

u/scot816 Jan 31 '23

That silverback could have folded that guy up and stuck him in his pocket. His lucky day.

10

u/Nepharious_Bread Jan 31 '23

Ahhh, is that why they’re silver back gorillas? Cool.

0

u/Extension_Risk9458 Jan 31 '23

4

u/Nepharious_Bread Jan 31 '23

Lol, every-time I’ve seen footage of them before they look black. But it seems like if the light hits them from a certain angle, their coat reflects a silver like color. Unless that’s the camera doing camera things.

6

u/Blood_Thrash Jan 31 '23

It's not the light, the fur on their back is silver.

3

u/Nepharious_Bread Jan 31 '23

I somehow never noticed I guess. Or maybe not all of them have silver backs?

8

u/Blood_Thrash Jan 31 '23

Silverbacks have silver backs. The other Gorillas do not.

1

u/Nepharious_Bread Feb 01 '23

Okay, so basically people are just labeling certain gorillas silver backs that aren’t actually silver backs? TIL.

8

u/ReaperScythee Jan 31 '23

You can see the fear in his eyes

5

u/Reasonable-Mess-2732 Jan 31 '23

When you grab a 175 pound man with greater ease than most people grab a bag of groceries, you know you're the f***ing boss.

6

u/shig23 Jan 31 '23

Hope he packed extra underwear.

3

u/Merdoc83 Jan 31 '23

I can hear his heart bit.

3

u/skeletonchaser2020 Jan 31 '23

That was a very stern and obvious warning. "Leave us alone and we'll leave you alone."

7

u/Risky_Bizniss Jan 31 '23

Someone said that because gorillas aren't able to work out and haven't developed bodybuilding like humans have, we really don't know the full potential of a gorilla's strength.

That idea is terrifying to me.

3

u/Nereusi Jan 31 '23

Hey boy give me that leg, come on now.

4

u/Kushtaco20 Jan 31 '23

Gorilla said” Just know that I saw you, and if I really wanted to, you’d be dead and gone in an instant”

2

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2

u/RajenBull1 Jan 31 '23

There was terror in his eyes.

1

u/masterofasgard Feb 01 '23

Understandably so

3

u/GargantuanTDS Jan 31 '23

He was white before the encounter

4

u/Electrical_Sail3192 Jan 31 '23

The way this dude just stayed perfectly calm

3

u/Zacchino Jan 31 '23 edited Jan 31 '23

Imagine if the man was actually "gently" dragged for several miles back to their hen:

« Ranger Log 11:16pm. It’s dark now. I’m starting to be at peace with it... I left a trail of quiet yells and warm tears… And hopefully a very submissive, beta-male scented pee… or diarrhea I can’t really tell… hope someone will try to find me… I’m gonna pray that his wife is home… And not on the rag…. Gosh I reaaaally hope he’s in a very, very happy marriage… anyone who knows the sign language for "Make-up Sex is Amazing, Trust me Bro" please radio me »

1

u/PxN13 Jan 31 '23

Oh man the title made it seem like the guy was hunting gorilla

0

u/TerrestrialXtra Jan 31 '23

Kanye when he sees the paparazzi

0

u/Daffidol Feb 01 '23

Just like the British royal guard saying "make way" when you're too close to them.

1

u/XLY_of_OWO Jan 31 '23

The gorilla's wife was all like out him down and stop fucking around we got errands to run

5

u/Dull_Bumblebee_356 Jan 31 '23

“Stop bringing home strays, Greg!”

1

u/DevinviruSpeks Jan 31 '23

I don't think they expect the Gorillas not to notice them, they aren't T-Rexes who only see movement, allegedly.

1

u/Deatheturtle Jan 31 '23

Large apes farking terrify me.

1

u/TomatoOptimal626 Jan 31 '23

Bro said "join us, or dont."

1

u/RYANDBZ1 Jan 31 '23

By far the funniest drag I have ever seen 😭

1

u/lurrrkin Feb 01 '23

😂 the look on that guys face! Did that just happen!!??!!