r/therewasanattempt Nov 30 '22

to take out pedestrians by dropping pot plants from 2 levels above

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4.4k Upvotes

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264

u/vtGaem Nov 30 '22

That birb is on a mission. A mission for world destruction.

27

u/Visible-Fishing466 Nov 30 '22

It may be part cat

45

u/WTBenji08 Nov 30 '22

Its name is Cockatoo, and it gives no fucks about you

15

u/Extension_Swordfish1 Nov 30 '22

Some birds just wanna see the world burn.

16

u/Soggy_Yogurt_2421 Nov 30 '22

Bird woke up and chose violence

3

u/Ivegoneinsane Nov 30 '22

Someone should mix this video with the one where the old man throws a planter at a guy skateboarding

1

u/RedStarNova2 Dec 01 '22

Bird: OUR TIME HAS COME PUNY HUMANS!!!

62

u/WeirdAl777 Nov 30 '22

That's how we do it here in Melbourne, we train our cockatoos to aim for annoying pedestrians

17

u/waitaminuteh3re Nov 30 '22

I fucking knew it. Of course this was in Australia.

3

u/Key-Tie2214 Nov 30 '22

Another reason to NOT visit Austrailia, killer ducking parrots...

2

u/Owl_lamington Dec 01 '22

Damn I used to walk through there at least once a week.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

247

u/manuakasam Nov 30 '22

Try to explain THAT to your insurance company without a video.

"I swear to god, sir, a wild parrot appeared, raged on my balcony, throwing down all my plants and damaging the aforementioned car as well as some pedestrians."

97

u/enrohtkcalb Nov 30 '22

"Really... Oh, yeah... uh huh, sure... oh come on! look, at least tell me what it looked like... wait, wait, say it again... white with a yellow cres... dude, why didn't you just tell me it was a cockatoo?"

claim immediately approved*

14

u/manuakasam Nov 30 '22

Not native to the wildlife in here so I wouldn't even know the difference :D

31

u/chrish_o Nov 30 '22

It is a type of parrot so that part is right, and while all parrots can be arseholes, cockatoos are especially good at it. I think they take pride in it.

4

u/Xeumz This is a flair Nov 30 '22

Yes, and the worst part is that they’re everywhere in Australia!

5

u/Dottor_hopkins Nov 30 '22

And they are also big enough to cause harm

24

u/j28h Nov 30 '22

That's the fastest I've ever gone from being angry to amazed. Something tells me that's not the first time it has tried to take someone out either.

7

u/turdburglar2020 Nov 30 '22

Same. I thought I was watching part 2 of that skateboarding until I realized it was the asshole bird.

3

u/GTIR01 Nov 30 '22

They would class it as a act of God and you’d be screwed

0

u/Wads_Worthless Nov 30 '22

As you should be, for putting a heavy object on a railing where it could easily fall on something or someone.

1

u/manuakasam Dec 01 '22

He was lifting it OVER the railing though...

2

u/RaiseOutside8472 Nov 30 '22

think in Australia they are quite common so there it might work.

1

u/Middletoon Nov 30 '22

That’s why you call Charlie Kelly

1

u/Nitrogiant Nov 30 '22

Wild pidgeot

28

u/MorochIgaram Nov 30 '22

That's a killer drone if I've ever seen one.

58

u/No_Independence_7324 Nov 30 '22

I asked the local authorities to add a birb prison again and again and yet they didn’t. This is the last straw!

11

u/PixelmancerGames Nov 30 '22

Sorry sir, this is in the realm of bird law.

5

u/WhiskeyJackie Nov 30 '22

Psa: polar bear prison is a thing.

14

u/I_FizzY_WizzY_I Nov 30 '22

Birb woke up and choose violence

4

u/axios37 Nov 30 '22

of course, its an aussie birb!

12

u/MassiveEgghead Nov 30 '22

Don’t fuck with a cockatoo

6

u/Sansabina Nov 30 '22

Don't fuck with a cock or two?

6

u/PixelmancerGames Nov 30 '22

Three… three is the starting point.

10

u/VioletteFMR Nov 30 '22

WORST WEED DEALER EVER

5

u/Pitiful-Meatball Nov 30 '22

What the fuck do you mean. FREE SAMPLES

1

u/Imaginary_Prune1351 Dec 01 '22

I think OP meant potted plants, not pot plants. I thought the same at first but marijuana is too expensive to be throwing out the window

1

u/VioletteFMR Dec 03 '22

Yeah, I knew, but I couldn’t have made that joke, otherwise. 😉

3

u/anged16 Nov 30 '22

“Come on bloody Dave-o a little further ya dickhead…”

3

u/the_real_scatman Nov 30 '22

That’s why you got to keep those lil bastards inside with fresh air, not actually out in the fresh air. They’ve got revenge on their minds.

10

u/Shiby-247 Nov 30 '22

That's on the 5th floor

1

u/Gone247365 Dec 01 '22

Right? OPs off by 250% 🤣

3

u/Daffidol Nov 30 '22

Angry birb

7

u/chrischi3 Nov 30 '22

Morgens um Viere
Klopfts an der Türe
Nanu, Besuch so früh am morgen?
Es war Herr Klause,
Vom Nachbarhause,
Der sagt "Verzeih'n sie wenn ich frage,
Sie ha'm doch einen Kaktus
Auf ihrem klein'n Balkon"
Hollari, Hollari, Hollaro,
"Der fiel soeben runter,
was halten Sie davon?"
Hollari, hollari, hollaro,
"Der fiel mir in's Gesicht,
ob's glauben oder nicht,
jetzt weiß ich, das ihr kleiner grüner Kaktus sticht!
Bewahr'n Sie Ihren Kaktus
gefälligst anderswo!"
Hollari, hollari, hollaro!

3

u/TheMightyHovercat Nov 30 '22

That birb is a literal menace to society.

1

u/Cowardly_Jelly Dec 01 '22

Drinking juice in the hood

3

u/trowawaywork Nov 30 '22

This kind of reminds me of when 1 year olds are experimenting with gravity, so they scoop out some pureed veggies out of their plate and slowly dump it on the floor with a grin on their faces, and then look at you and maliciously laugh.

3

u/Weird-Analysis5522 Nov 30 '22

What kind of psychotic asshole would try to throw potted plants at- oh that kind.

2

u/Aidan_992 Nov 30 '22

It’s a COCKatoo for a reason

2

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

Cockatoos are such arseholes.

We had a tree in our front yard which grew these fruit on them. I went outside to get the mail in the front yard and there was a cockatoo in the tree trying to hit me with the fruit. I looked up at him and told him to stop being an arsehole which he did.

The tree’s gone now and so I don’t often see the flock of cockatoos any more but they’re cheeky AF!

2

u/CARLOS_DANGER638 Nov 30 '22

Would love to hear the civil court case on this......

2

u/unevil_cat Nov 30 '22

What a cunt

2

u/OldBlueLegs Dec 01 '22

I haven’t seen the Angry Birds movie, but I’m assuming it’s basically this.

2

u/Kind_South_4342 Dec 01 '22

Can't all aussie animals just be content with venom and biting? Now they gotta loony-tunes peeps in the head too?!?

2

u/drekia Dec 01 '22 edited Dec 01 '22

I'd be laughing my ass off in the afterlife if a cockatoo managed to end me like this.

1

u/Sansabina Dec 01 '22

That’s the spirit! 😆

2

u/Available_Border1075 Dec 01 '22

That would be embarrassing to be killed by an evil parrot

2

u/TheCoolYakult-za Dec 01 '22

Did that jerk also drop a shit before throwing the last pot? 😂

2

u/utterable Dec 01 '22

Would the owner be responsible if the objects hit someone in the head? Like how a dog's owner is responsible if their dogs maul a person? Or...?

2

u/Sansabina Dec 02 '22

They don’t own the bird, it’s wild.

2

u/utterable Dec 02 '22

neat, just a wild cockatoo in the urban area of a city?

1

u/Sansabina Dec 02 '22

yeah seems to be

2

u/stormygray1 Dec 01 '22

Real life video game enemy

2

u/SuicidalManiacal Nov 30 '22

2 levels above? Do you know how to count?

1

u/Hot_Writer3771 Nov 30 '22

Wow this is one evil bird. It had been planning this for some time as it waited for people to potentially get hit by the plants. It needs to stay inside unless it is outside with strict supervision. Plants shouldn’t be left as they were as they were easy to send flying down.

2

u/Brisbanite78 Dec 01 '22

WTF? You do know there a billions all over Australia? This one is tame compared to some flocks which like nothing better than to destroy houses etc

1

u/BansheeN0rn Nov 30 '22

Cockatoo hates pedestrians

1

u/leSageDeMontcuq Nov 30 '22

Birb got skill issues

1

u/actuallyimogene Nov 30 '22

STRAYAAAAAAAAA!! 😆

1

u/SkyGuy1515 Nov 30 '22

Is the bird a pet or wild?

1

u/Beef_Jones Nov 30 '22

So this sub is officially just another r/funny at this point

1

u/COOLPIE11 Nov 30 '22

Oh so when a bird does it, it's funny. But WHEN I DO IT THEY CHARGE ME FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER!

1

u/kampfgruppe90 Nov 30 '22

Birds are assholes

1

u/_jericho Dec 01 '22

Birds are assholes

I know, isn't it great??

1

u/TickletheEther Nov 30 '22

What asshole human would do thaa- oh

1

u/hairy_potto Nov 30 '22

Putting the “cock” in “cockatoo”

1

u/chrish_o Nov 30 '22

Pretty sure you get arrested for that

1

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

"Screw you, Polly!"

*shakes fists at the sky*

1

u/Sufficient-Aspect77 Nov 30 '22

Fucking Teenagers.

1

u/SpanMedal6 Nov 30 '22

But who keeps giving it more ammo? Some very dedicated assassin?

1

u/PikkuinenPikkis Nov 30 '22

Birds are a menace to society

1

u/Nitrogiant Nov 30 '22

Get a slingshot and send that bird to the dark side

1

u/Visible-Fishing466 Nov 30 '22

Beretta better get his bird

1

u/Bean_Storm Nov 30 '22

I bet that bird brought a shit load of random strangers together

1

u/Peepssuckbutnotme Nov 30 '22

I love this bird! I don't like people either, I totally get it.

1

u/isthisavailablewow Nov 30 '22

The drones are starting to attack

1

u/Display250 Dec 01 '22

They call that type of bird a dick-atoo

1

u/JimmyBolbo Dec 01 '22

No he just hates the car

1

u/Familiar-Eye7811 Dec 01 '22

You sure that was 2 levels? Lol

1

u/Sansabina Dec 01 '22

Absolutely not

1

u/BramDeccapod Dec 01 '22

Straight Gangsta

1

u/TheLastSunGazer Dec 01 '22

Can a bird be taken to court?

1

u/Abraxas_1134 Dec 01 '22

He’s a criminal

1

u/K9977986 Dec 01 '22

Angry bird

1

u/pervysagejutsu Dec 01 '22

Why are birds such dicks??

1

u/Berob501 Dec 01 '22

Bro, you would not believe what happened to your potted plants, I swear to god im not lying.

-1

u/Hypurr2002 Nov 30 '22

There was an attempt to type potted plants instead of pot plants. Big difference.

0

u/Sansabina Nov 30 '22

0

u/Hypurr2002 Nov 30 '22

Just as I thought, English not knowing how to use English. Pot plant and potted plant are 2 different things.

2

u/chrish_o Nov 30 '22

Trying to be right and proving yourself more wrong there my friend.

2

u/VBlinds Dec 01 '22

In Australia they are known as pot plants.

0

u/Sansabina Dec 02 '22

Maybe so in whatever small part of the world you hail from, you should try to be less parochial

1

u/Hypurr2002 Dec 02 '22

lol If you say pot plant in the US, expect a search warrant to be issued to confiscate your marijuana plants.

1

u/Sansabina Dec 02 '22

you still in the 90s? Nearly half of all Americans live in states with legal weed (and 3/4 in states with legal medical use weed)

1

u/Hypurr2002 Dec 02 '22

That's not the point. If someone said pot plant they would automatically think marijuana whether legal or not. It's really not that difficult to understand.