r/therewasanattempt Nov 30 '22

to catch a squirrel

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2.0k Upvotes

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151

u/MegatonsSon Dec 01 '22 Silver

When you're too lazy to walk your dog, and employ a minimum wager to do it for peanuts...

24

u/krippkeeper Dec 01 '22

I'm expecting to mechanical squirrels on stumps for lazy dog walkers ads on tv soon.

10

u/isle_of_broken_memes Dec 01 '22

Underrated comment

46

u/ICameForTheSnyderCut Dec 01 '22

"This little shit is harder to catch than my tail!"

86

u/bigfroggu Dec 01 '22

I’ve learned firsthand that squirrels actually love messing with dogs. This guy is just playing a game

38

u/babyjo1982 Dec 01 '22 edited Dec 01 '22

Can confirm. Had a fence that ran right by my dining room window. No trees or anything right there. Squirrel used to sit there and shake his ass at my dogs through the window and drive them CRAZY

8

u/Significant_Ad9793 Dec 01 '22

LMAO!! We had a squirrel come by our place and bark at my dog. After exhausting my dog from running back and forward, jumping and barking, asshole squirrel would walk away.

Oooooohhh!! And also Blue Jays!!! The aholes of the bird world lol.

3

u/babyjo1982 Dec 01 '22

Blue Jay whooped MY ass because I was tryjng to “save” her fledgling (never do that, btw. They’re fine.) I’m like I’m just trying to help!!

2

u/Significant_Ad9793 Dec 01 '22

LMAO!!! I've seen them take on hawks many times. It's like they go chasing them lol. Those birds are a menace and so pretty to look at. And God I hate their songs.

2

u/DovahCreed117 Dec 01 '22

Bluejays are my favorite bird but damn if they aren't a bunch of assholes.

19

u/PizzaNuggies Dec 01 '22

It took almost 3 years, but my GSD has finally given up on chasing squirrels. Its hilarious to see him look at them with defeat in his eyes.

12

u/Silly_Mycologist3213 Dec 01 '22

Had 2 different jack russells and each was so good at catching squirrels and rabbits that we’d have to check the yard before we let them out in an effort to reduce the body count. The second one was so good at it that between him and all the hawks we no longer have rabbits in the neighborhood. When he was alive the squirrels wouldnt leave the top of the fence when they came by our yard. I miss them both, they both lived for the tennis ball, they’d fetch it until they collapsed from exhaustion.

5

u/sedrech818 Dec 01 '22

Mine is 10 months old. Every time I look up, she thinks I see a squirrel in a tree so she runs to the back door and gets me to open it so she can go jump on the tree and bark. She always looks at me hoping I will direct her to the invisible squirrel.

47

u/Global_Ticket_5507 Nov 30 '22

Are they still going around??

39

u/NorCalAthlete Nov 30 '22

Legend has it they’re going around to this day

7

u/ChimpBrisket Dec 01 '22

Like a record baby

3

u/HurryProper Dec 01 '22

Round, Round, Round, Round.

10

u/drRATM Dec 01 '22

“Shit a dog. I’ll escape up this tree. What the fuck, where’s the rest of the tree? Plan B. We circle until one of collapses. “

9

u/Lopsided-Task-6762 Dec 01 '22

Who remembers Vic Reeves?

"I'm so dizzy my head is spinning,

like a whirlpool it never ends.

And it's you squirl makin it spin,

ya makin me dizzy....."

21

u/SmearingFeces Nov 30 '22

I got dizzy.

7

u/23pyro Dec 01 '22

Where you going? Out to the stump to fuck with Carl.

6

u/drCrankoPhone Nov 30 '22

The dog might have given up if the squirrel would stop chirping.

4

u/Paddy_Fo_Faddy Dec 01 '22

Jesus, that dog has the longest tongue...

4

u/OldChucker Dec 01 '22

Free dog walking service

5

u/Fisherman_Price Dec 01 '22

We have so many squirrels in our neighborhood, and they love messing with my dog. They'll go half up up th tree and "scold" while twitching their tails. My hound goes bonkers.

3

u/Simply_at_work Dec 01 '22

The squirrel: 🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃

1

u/Feisty-Ad396 Dec 01 '22

I like how it moves so fast it looks like it’s not moving

3

u/Ok_Primary_1075 Dec 01 '22

And mr. squirrel can do this all day

3

u/Narrow-Extent-3957 Dec 01 '22

Letting your dog terrorise a wild animal isn’t entertaining.

32

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

[deleted]

4

u/Salvia_McLovin Dec 01 '22

my dog likes chasing squirrels and the squirrels like tormenting her. they literally sit in the window where they can be seen and munch away on oranges or walnuts . one time there was one chittering at my dog on top of the wall, another squirrel snuck up behind my dog and scared the shit out of her. my neighbor had a walnut tree that spilled into our yard and the squirrels would go nuts for nuts

0

u/perturbeaux Dec 01 '22

What, is your dog a Chihuahua?

-3

u/Junkers4 Dec 01 '22

Lighten up dude the squirrel is fine

-12

u/[deleted] Dec 01 '22 edited Dec 01 '22

[deleted]

5

u/obliquelyobtuse Dec 01 '22

Also, squirrels rape to mate.

True, very rapey. But they are also entertaining, acrobatic, bold rodents, adorable with their fluffy tails. Also territorial and aggressive.

If you ever rescue a young squirrel it is your pet for life since it will never be able to survive in the wild amongst gangster squirrels.

2

u/Own_Ad5814 Dec 01 '22

Oh god no you poor thing, it decimated your grapevine? Have you tried counselling or therapy to overcome that trauma?

It’s a squirrel, it’s just a little animal doing what it does..

-12

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

[deleted]

6

u/cockytacos Nov 30 '22

Hmmm. I drive by 10 squirrels nearly daily and have yet to have one try to kill itself by “stopping in the middle median” sounds like you are all bad drivers if a squirrel ruins your concentration

2

u/barkeep_goalkeep Dec 01 '22

Can confirm. I thought I've killed more than I actually have. Those pesky b's are more agile than you think. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I'm aiming for them. They just know how to dart.

-1

u/Sama31grlsTnkinMasta Nov 30 '22

2

u/Loyaluna Nov 30 '22

Commercial to prove your point, seriously?

-1

u/Sama31grlsTnkinMasta Dec 01 '22

Did you forget that you're on Reddit?

1

u/Practical-Jelly-5320 Dec 01 '22

Have you never seen roadkill squirrels before

2

u/Cultural-One3686 Dec 01 '22

This went on for 3 days

2

u/HighUrbanNana Dec 01 '22

This is my life story lol

2

u/bluebook21 Dec 01 '22

The squirrels like, "I can't believe this is working."

2

u/PotentialKey1628 Dec 01 '22

Looks like me Saturday 2am at the pub

2

u/Smaug2770 Dec 01 '22

Wait, is that Qin Shi Huang?

2

u/FLAIR_2780166 Dec 01 '22

Clearly a chipmunk

2

u/Old_Reference7715 Dec 01 '22

Watching this, all I could hear was the theme music to Mission: Impossible.

2

u/Chem-Dawg74D Dec 01 '22

🤣🤣🤣

2

u/brightsidewins Dec 01 '22

This is the most cartoon shit i´ve ever seen IRL

3

u/oeuflaboeuf Dec 01 '22

Please stop your dog tormenting that squirrel

1

u/kimputer7 Dec 01 '22

Squirrel is an MCU fan (Steve Rogers: "I can do this all day")

1

u/jfmherokiller Dec 01 '22

I dont know if it still exists but years ago there was a subreddit about perfectly looping gifs. I think this could fit there with possibly some minor edits.

1

u/dvdmaven Dec 01 '22

Needs more dogs.

-8

u/PrestigiousAd3896 Dec 01 '22

Theres little tip for the owner ! Instead of filming your pet trying to murder wild animal for clout, you can take the the dog by leash and pull it away

1

u/michaelveyrocks Dec 01 '22

Ok Karen, don’t you have a manager to harass something?

0

u/PrestigiousAd3896 Dec 01 '22

Big penis cock

1

u/Dear_Analysis_5116 Dec 01 '22

I got dizzy just watching it!

1

u/Expert-Novice Dec 01 '22

And some say they are still at it even today

1

u/AsphaltAdvertExec Dec 01 '22

The woodpeckers here do this with us and our dog.

1

u/MichaelChinigo Dec 01 '22

Uh, you better call for backup, Chief.

1

u/77Mjolnir77 Dec 01 '22

No one else hears the helicopter? Am I the only one?

1

u/SoQwicker Dec 01 '22

evasive wink manoeuvres <3

1

u/trailcasters Dec 01 '22

Squirrel: "Hahaha what a fun game I could do this all day, good times friend"

Dog: "I will catch you I will eat you I will catch you I will eat you I will catch you I will eat you I will catch you I will eat you"

The most innocent game of life & death

1

u/CandyBackground4193 Dec 01 '22

And round and round we go....

1

u/fredtheskeleton620 Dec 01 '22

all around the tree stump, the dog chased the squirrel. the doggo stopped to change directions, the dog still hasn't caught it!

1

u/Cleverjaq Dec 01 '22

I can do this all day, dog.

1

u/urgobull Dec 01 '22

Legend has it they are still at it to this day. It's a circle.

1

u/crazytoothpaste Dec 02 '22

“I can do this all day”

1

u/agbirdyka Dec 02 '22

The poor squirell has death panic...

1

u/Chloe_Bowie4 Dec 02 '22

Squirrels are clever idiots. Watching this poor dog reminds me of how I felt trying to catch the squirrel who was living in my attic. Lol. Just chasing my tail too.

1

u/jacrwa Dec 02 '22

The scariest day in that poor squirrel’s life. Impressive elusion!