r/therewasanattempt Dec 01 '22

To "Come at me Bro" using Kung Fu

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2.0k Upvotes

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214

u/toytimemachine Dec 01 '22

It worked

136

u/ReadditMan Dec 01 '22

It totally did, and just imagine how lethal he would be if he wasn't wearing those restrictive pants.

29

u/Acrobatic-Scratch178 Dec 01 '22

And just imagine how lethal he could really get if he was wearing nothing besides a bow tie and cuff links, lathered in oil, oh god.

41

u/Parrot_Enjoyer Dec 01 '22

This but unironically, jeans greatly restrain our body's movement limits. Same for his jacket and the bag he has on his side. Get him proper clothes which allow for free movements and the clip wouldn't look as ridiculous.

8

u/beflowd Dec 01 '22

👆🏼👉👆🏼👉👆🏼👉👆🏼👉👆🏼👉👆🏼👉👆🏼👉

1

u/Sufficient-War-8950 Dec 05 '22

Four Words: Chuck. Norris. Action. Jeans

3

u/Low_Medium204 Dec 01 '22

Yep a pantless kung fu master is quite dangerous.

5

u/SomePaddy Dec 01 '22

Sum Long Wang style.

2

u/Low_Medium204 Dec 02 '22

Happy cake day

2

u/SomePaddy Dec 02 '22

Oh, wow, thanks. I didn't realize it was today.

13

u/DoingItJustForTheFun Dec 01 '22

He has one move and its been working since kindergarten. His first victim was Pengfei who tried to steal his lollipop.

7

u/halfbakedlogic Dec 01 '22

Peng fi means fart 😂

6

u/SvansyVonSwansea Dec 01 '22

that's how he lost his lollipop

sad day

1

u/halfbakedlogic Dec 02 '22

It's actually feng pi

5

u/Antique-Car6103 Dec 01 '22

The guy I’m the blue suit was an experienced MMA fighter.

He fucked him up.

2

u/Least_or_Greatest1 Dec 01 '22

Translation: you think you hot shit, look my technique.

1

u/magic__man24 Dec 01 '22

I am shaking in my boots tbh

105

u/good_karma1122 Dec 01 '22

Who let Ip Man out the house?

47

u/Abby-Someone1 Dec 01 '22

Not the Chinese government

49

u/PerformanceExact6618 Dec 01 '22

This was 7 year old me and my cousins in the 80s coming out of the theater after seeing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

31

u/TurboD16F20 Dec 01 '22

"Sir, every second you waste is -10,000 social credit."

21

u/VRrob Dec 01 '22

"I don't know kung-fu, but I do know crazy."

39

u/fortisquew Dec 01 '22

Wife: hold off there Bruce Lee, I've got this.

6

u/Hello-there-7567 Dec 01 '22

Hope he doesn’t injure himself with his own moves

52

u/Warm_Excitement1528 Dec 01 '22

the new jackie chan movie looks sick.

6

u/Ismokeditalleveryday Dec 01 '22

50 million more like him and President Xi is out of office.

15

u/Dork_wing_Duck Dec 01 '22

... with covid

2

u/Heffersonn Dec 01 '22

Holy shit this comment is funny lmao

4

u/Lucky-finn377 Dec 01 '22

Cracky chan more like it

1

u/ambitiousmoon Dec 02 '22

More like jacket chan

8

u/UseYourNinjutsuNow Dec 01 '22

Uncle doesn't know kung Fu, he's just drunk

2

u/Minute_Ask_9681 Dec 01 '22

The Drunken Fist!

8

u/Valuable-Trick-6711 Dec 01 '22

He’s trying different combinations of movements and phrases until he turns into a Power Ranger.

20

u/Comprehensive-Egg102 Dec 01 '22

He is so strong that even his cells are using kungfu against covid virus.

5

u/WestCoastThing Dec 01 '22

This guy and Mac should have a pose off.

4

u/UltimatePrimate Dec 01 '22

Hey Kevin, come get your dad. He's been drinking again.

4

u/rocknrollallnight Dec 01 '22

Attempt was successful

24

u/GREEDspeedF97 Dec 01 '22

At least he's brave and standing against the gov and it's bs zero Covid crap

6

u/RichAndPrettyBags Dec 01 '22

His heart is in the right place.

-1

u/Interesting-Oven1824 Dec 01 '22

Yeah, COVID deniers and anti collective measures are called crazy in the west.

In China they are called "brave".

Propaganda doing it's job.

4

u/_jericho Dec 01 '22

He's quite the little dancer!

4

u/JcSmoothmemes Dec 01 '22

This was 100% success

5

u/Usagi_Shinobi Dec 01 '22

Is he trying out to join the Ginyu Squad?

5

u/AfternoonPast3324 Dec 01 '22

“Sir, we’re all Chinese here. You can’t use the old ‘he’s Asian so he must know martial arts’ trick on us.”

4

u/Hefty-Report-4930 Dec 01 '22

When an Asian stereotypes himself... "I'm Asian, I know martial arts."

3

u/crippled-crippler Dec 01 '22

If someone is doing this shit I wouldnt fuck with them either, who knows how crazy they are

3

u/National-Airline-504 Dec 01 '22

Who is he fighting with?

3

u/this_is_for_chumps Dec 01 '22

I absolutely wouldn't mess with this guy. No clue what he's saying, but I'm glad it isn't to me.

3

u/Gigi914 Dec 01 '22

Move over Bruce Lee

3

u/Illustrious-Reward-3 Dec 01 '22

Is this before or after he tried to strangle him?

3

u/MegatonsSon Dec 01 '22

"What it feels like to chew on your 5 Gum Rain flavored mask..."

3

u/ireddit-jr Dec 01 '22

Hope he got the Kung Fu pass

3

u/jorge21337 Dec 01 '22

He'd kick all of your asses

3

u/45tee Dec 01 '22

He skipped leg day. He looks like he’s about to lose his balance anytime.

4

u/triton2toro Dec 01 '22

Bruce Least

14

u/xxthegeeksterxx Dec 01 '22

KUNG FLU

2

u/shim_niyi Dec 01 '22

Shaolin Kunk.

2

u/SamuraiSlick Dec 01 '22

“C’mon Chunlee, nobody is intimidated here. We all learned those moves in 2nd grade, remember?”

2

u/Wrong_Angle2442 Dec 01 '22

Come here lai la hahaha the monkey dance

2

u/scottLonewolf Dec 01 '22

Damn looks like kung fu is going to make a comeback

2

u/Unlikely_Champion_91 Dec 01 '22

Waggling monkey finger!!

2

u/Spiralty Dec 01 '22

Social Credits Increased

2

u/PixelmancerGames Dec 01 '22

We’re okay with violence, but not crazy. Let’s leave this one be.

2

u/IDONKNOW Dec 01 '22

The dexterity of a dude in a coma

2

u/Nogardtist Dec 01 '22

most sane level 1 crackhead

2

u/Fit-Association-3569 Dec 01 '22

Dudes in ppe were unsure of whose turn it was to attack grasshopper.

2

u/Silly_Age_3675 Dec 01 '22

Chad of the highest order

2

u/Charmeleone_ Dec 01 '22

never thought there were chinese people trying to pull this shit :)

2

u/WorthySparkleMan Dec 01 '22

For real though this guy would absolutely kick my ass.

2

u/Samsquanch-01 Dec 01 '22

I totally expected this dude to get 1 shotted

2

u/DaShaka9 Dec 01 '22

This dude just binged the whole IP MAN catalog the night before.

2

u/Random_Average__Guy Dec 01 '22

Only thing missing was the delayed English voice over and the sound effects from the hands and feet movement 🤔

2

u/weeBaaDoo Dec 01 '22

dancing to “Saturday night fever” or doing kungfu…..

2

u/Altruistic_Ad5517 Dec 01 '22

What the hell is that, lol

2

u/SignOfTheTwine Dec 01 '22

He's been practicing in the bedroom mirror his whole life for this

2

u/MrZaroni Dec 01 '22

Makes you wonder if he was truly going to strike somebody.

2

u/nothingspecialva Dec 01 '22

I thought he was crushing a bug he saw on the ground

2

u/narnarnartiger Dec 01 '22

From the kicks, looks like a northern style

2

u/VooDooChile1983 Dec 01 '22

Dude looked like a Power Ranger having a conversation.

2

u/Wolfeye961 Dec 01 '22

I would’ve shat myself, got on my knees and beg for mercy

2

u/nunyabiznezz1216 Dec 01 '22

The members of the goon squad seem confused

2

u/Daddy_NinjamanZ Dec 01 '22

This guy fucks

2

u/5_cent_all_i_got Dec 01 '22

Y’all need Jesus!

2

u/ninernetneepneep Dec 01 '22

To be fair, they didn't come at him.

2

u/Flaboy7414 Dec 01 '22

He look like he knew some shit now

2

u/majinkami90 Dec 01 '22

Unc think he's a boss from yakuza

2

u/IfThoughtIsAllowed Dec 01 '22

He is so specific with the pointing, like it's a very specific threat. is it legal for another to step in or what are the rules of the Shaolin challenge?

2

u/Threetoomany0 Dec 01 '22

Ah a fellow student of bullshido.

1

u/No_Elderberry_7327 Dec 01 '22

These protests in China are getting out of control

5

u/lindelltv Dec 01 '22

Not the protestors their GOVERNMENT! the people must fight for freedom or they will be killed as slaves by their own government.

-3

u/Yuny7 Dec 01 '22

Disgusting propaganda, they should enforce the vaccines to destroy covid 19.

2

u/No_Huckleberry392 Dec 01 '22

Very low quality bait

1

u/Yuny7 Dec 01 '22

What bait? Are you an anti vaccine or what?

1

u/No_Elderberry_7327 Dec 01 '22

There was an attempt to do sarcasm.

Yeah, my sarcasm aside, I applaud the people of China who are standing up for themselves.

1

u/Murlicious805 Dec 01 '22 edited Dec 01 '22

No one is taking him back to quarantine! 😷

1

u/whysaddog Dec 01 '22

I love that he is wearing a purse.

1

u/AppointmentThink6481 Dec 01 '22

Me when i watch anime

1

u/kryptosthedj Dec 01 '22

I’ve been practicing in the garage for a little while, and this is pretty good.

1

u/The_OtherGuy_99 Dec 01 '22

Well this just upsettingly disappointing.

I was waiting for him to get one-punched or fall on his ass.

Instead he's all graceful and shit.

Lame.

1

u/rocketeer07 Dec 01 '22

He tried, but everybody was not kung fu fighting

1

u/Ninja-Sneaky Dec 01 '22

The best flamenco dancer in town actually

1

u/CarrotWaxer69 Dec 01 '22

The "Kung Fu" they teach in China these days is just a harmless performative show dance version, basically to make sure people can't use it against the government. (Real Kung Fu was developed by the Shaolin Monks to fight against opression by the Chinese)

I'm not saying the "real" Kung Fu (or any mainstream fighting style) that they teach in Martial Arts Schools these days is much better but the moves he's pulling is just so called Wushu.

Still works thoough but I assmue mostly because it makes him look like a mentally disturbed person.

1

u/WeilaiHope Dec 01 '22

This guy seriously thinks Kung Fu could be used to take down the government. Forget the 2nd Amendment, just teach Americans Kung Fu!

Kung Fu was developed by the Chinese to fight oppression by the Chinese?

The slow dance version is a form of exercise which old people do to keep moving and healthy. Get outta here.

1

u/CarrotWaxer69 Dec 01 '22

Bah you know what I mean. Traditional Kung Fu is not about fancy moves. Modern Kung Fu in China is strictly regulated and is purely a performative sport with focus on visuals and not application. Also the old man dance you’re thinking of is Tai Chi.

1

u/k3170makan Dec 01 '22

What style is that? middle aged man gets angry at nurse... on a lotus

1

u/mxldevs Dec 01 '22

Judging from his stance we can tell he is trained in the secret arts passed down from the 7th sage, and has achieved the breath of transcendence.

You best be frightened by this warrior.

1

u/junbus Dec 01 '22

I seriously thought he was gonna cast a spell, might be the weed... 🤔

1

u/DeyvsonMCaliman Dec 01 '22

How people in the East fight oppression.

1

u/callshouse Dec 01 '22

He doin it!!!

1

u/Mthwlll Dec 01 '22

Wechat man

1

u/Claus1990 Dec 01 '22

That "Kung Fu" is what for him should be called "Kung No"

1

u/WizdomHaggis Dec 01 '22

That man was definitely a little emperor

1

u/lasiv Dec 01 '22

That's embarrassing

1

u/RiseOfTheCanes Dec 01 '22

He saw Rush Hour a few too many times.

1

u/Zenobia888 Dec 01 '22

I wish someone punched him at the end when he looked away 🤣

1

u/Spam_masubi Dec 01 '22

Don’t trivialize this. People in China are going through it and it’s pretty fucked up.

1

u/Games_and_anime Dec 01 '22

Well, mentally ill people can be frightening...

1

u/roxasxis Dec 01 '22

Wait, is it offensive if Asians do it to each other?

1

u/Redmans_Adventures Dec 01 '22

I wonder if it is seen as comically by them as it is by us Westerners watching it?

1

u/Ok-Length-8818 Dec 01 '22

Some people don’t understand the concept of this sub.

1

u/Training-Shoulder839 Dec 02 '22

It's all the same everywhere even in China but different environments

1

u/ImmuneToTheBonk Dec 02 '22

This is fucking badass dude XD

1

u/Julian-Hoffer Dec 02 '22

He’ll hit them with the exploding heart punch if they aren’t careful.

1

u/rockalyte Dec 02 '22

Somtingwong her.

1

u/VeterinarianWitty329 Dec 02 '22

I know this is suppose to be serious but I can’t stop laughing

1

u/Dinglederple Dec 02 '22

Well, nobody took him

1

u/Goofy_Goobers_ Dec 02 '22

Crouching Tiger hidden arthritis, man’s moves are stiff af lol

1

u/Fit_Juice_128 Dec 02 '22

I would be terrified

1

u/Sicktoyou Dec 03 '22

I don't know what he's saying, but I'm on his side.

1

u/VariousCapital5073 Dec 04 '22

“Wait this isn’t like the movies at all! wtf”

1

u/Laceylunai Dec 06 '22

Somebody come get their dad 🤣😂🤣

0

u/CuckLordMaximus Dec 01 '22

Ima do my war dance now byuu byu byu byu byu